It's a tough choice, save the princess or save your coworkers from BO.
Horrible choice for a counter-weight, or horrible choice for a makeshift bomb? You be the judge.
In the war of the toilet seat positions there are no winn... wait is that a washing machine in the bathroom? I don't think I don't want those fragrances associated with my fresh laundry.
Another possible solution: The Dark Tower. You just might not want to read the ending though, lest your anger cause you to topple your creation.
It's not his fault you chose the cheapest internet service that loses connectivity every 45 minutes.