The Importance of Personal Grooming

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The Importance of Personal Grooming
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It might seem like a harsh reason to dump somebody, but have you ever tried to crack open an unshorn coconut? It's more trouble than it's worth. #thirdworldproblems

And I'm Like "OMG, Becky's Not Even That Hot"

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And I'm Like "OMG, Becky's Not Even That Hot" View Fullscreen
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People who text while driving: they're bad news.

Also, that's still the best commercial to come from that series of "tough guy in a suit represents an ultra-specific accident" ads.

Does Not Compute

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Does Not Compute
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There are several ways to interpret this answer. Choose your own adventure! Are you an optimist or a pessimist?

Optimist: You can't subtract a woman from a man, because without his woman, a man is nothing.

Pessimist: Men and women are incompatible, will never get along, and both are doomed to stunted and unfulfilled relationships.

Okay, both are kinda pessimistic, but one is much more so.

Prepare for the Most Awkward Day Ever

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Prepare for the Most Awkward Day Ever
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THAT'S WHY YOU SAY THESE THINGS IN PERSON

NOT OVER YOUR EXPENSIVE TOY

ARE YOU MAD

If I Was a Girl...

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If I Was a Girl...
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From the submitter:

I had a new phone number for several months, and it seemed to belong to a girl (probably hot). Then I received this.

Women attract, men mostly repel.

autocowrecks - men and women i'm horny