It's like a white-collar Jean Valjean who has a job, but is still so poor that he has to steal energy bars in order to feed his family. He is hunted down relentlessly by coworker Javert.
~Office Lackey Jack
Found on the fridge this morning
Resistance to puns is futensile.
Did anyone else see this and think of strippers? No? Never mind.
Buddha would brew the pot exactly halfway, Zeus would drink the rest of the coffee and wait for someone else to fill it, and Shiva doesn't need any caffeine.