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poll finds that the onion is more credible than alex jones infowars
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If you need to get your news, you could do worse than The Onion, a new poll shows.

According to Morning Consult, “a media and technology company at the intersection of politics, policy, Wall Street, and business strategy,” the satirical newspaper The Onion, which recently ran the headline “Report: Bananas Still Most Popular Fruit For Pretending To Receive Phone Call” is more credible than Infowars, which recently ran the headline “The Shocking Proof That Multiculturalism Has Failed.” No surprise here: The Onion headline is true.

In a shocking upset to conspiracy theorists and screaming men around the globe, 18 percent of people polled considered The Onion (again, the paper put together for laughs) credible, while only 17 percent considered InfoWars credibe. Even more shocking is our new Chief Strategist to the White House Steve Bannon’s former stomping ground, Breitbart, is only considered 19 percent credible. People aren’t just finding white supremacy very helpful these days.

via Reddit

Of course, as the poll points out, this might be affected by the fact that people haven’t heard of Breitbart or Infowars.

“Credibility was significantly lower for far-right sites such as Breitbart and InfoWars, but both were also hampered by being largely unknown. Forty-two percent of people said they “never heard of” Breitbart, and 49 percent said the same about InfoWars. Twenty-six percent said Breitbart was not credible, while 21 percent said the same of InfoWars. Breitbart and InfoWars did better with Republican men, with 32 percent and 27 percent respectively saying the sites were credible.”

You’re still probably better off choosing The Onion. Check out this headline from the other day. Topical! 

via The Onion

cow,Probably bad News,news,oh god why
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Once a Nazi cow, always a Nazi cow.

A british farmer named Derek Gow (not a Nazi) recently killed and ate some of his Nazi-bred cattle after discovering they were too violent towards him and his staff to keep around the farm.

He originally imported 13 of the rare "Heck" cattle, which were genetically modified beasts created for the Nazi regime by German zoologists Heinz and Lutz Heck back in the 1930s.

Adolf Hitler wanted to bring the legendary Auroch back to life, an aggressive beast with large horns that went extinct back in the 1600s.

The Nazi scientists combined Spanish fighting bulls with Highland cattle and several other breeds to produce the monsters, which were then used as propaganda.

Most of them were destroyed after the war, but some survived. Gow received his herd from Belgium in 2009, marking the first time the creatures have appeared in England in 4000 years.

The meat from the Nazi cows that were slaughtered will be sold to stores in Europe, says Gow. He tried sausages made from the animals and described it as "very tasty."

Via: tpmtv
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Cable news: Where the tone shifts from self-congratulatory militaristic back-patting to low-hanging misogyny fruit in the blink of an eye.

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