From the submitter:
If this statement wasn't clarified, a hugely embarrasing moment may have occured at the train station.
HI BILLY MAYS HERE WITH ANOTHER FANTASTIC PRODUCT
IF YOU'RE LIKE OTHER AMERICANS YOU LOVE TO EAT CHIPOTLE
BUT YOU HATE ALL THOSE TERRIBLE BLOOD STAINS IN YOUR UNDERWEAR
WE'VE GOT THE PERFECT PRODUCT FOR YOU
I even tattooed you to my back!
I'm working on my pooping speed, so hopefully i won't bother you for too long.
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