Be sure to send in your misleading mail-in rebate as well, which gives you store credit that's only redeemable for, like, five days, and takes six to eight months to get mailed back to you!
Don't miss out on this lame-ass opportunity!
You might have missed it because of that distracting rectangle, but the receipt is filled with delightful examples of a cashier whose power has gone to his head. His Holiness indeed.
"All right sir, we have a 90-day 'no friendzone warranty which covers you being clingy and overly emotional. Would you like to purchase the Jealousy upgrade for only $49.99 more?"