The last time I checked satellites were in the sky; I'm really hoping this whole thing just gets super-glued to the back of his Civic.
I think the next logical step is a pulled-tooth via skydiving.
Dude, seriously? Aren't you worried about your dog or even the plethora of flammable chemicals you're throwing sparks at? There's a fine line between kludging and wanton disregard for safety, this is definitely the latter.
Steal 3D glasses from the theatre. Buy two pocket projectors. Borrow a tripod from your "aspiring photographer" cousin. Kludge them all together after pirating any James Cameron "film".
.... no profit
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