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Step 1: Take the stuffing out of a human-sized teddy bear.
Step 2: Wear its skin.
Step 3: ????

You might be asking, "why did this happen?". Well, what else are you going to do with a giant, stuffed bear?

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Russell Wilson wanted to shout his love from the Twitter tops with (more than one) #WomanCrushWednesday posts about Ciara. He searched desperately for the words to describe her beauty and settled on a mash-up of corny, poetic words from the first creative writing website he found.

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Kanye West used to date Amber Rose, who later married and then divorced Wiz Khalifa. Now Kanye is married to Kim Kardashian and Khalifa is married to weed. Khalifa made a tweet about his "KK" pot, Kanye misunderstood and dragged Amber Rose into the conversation because who knows why? Amber Rose responded and gave us the best hashtag of 2016 yet: #FingersInTheBootyAssBitch. There was also much talk about pants, are you ready for your memes yet? Good.

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Today in Twitter theater we have the story of Dave Holmes, an LA based writer and comedian who received a scam call from someone pretending to be from the IRS. Since he was at the beginning of a commute, Dave decided to go along with the scheme.

Content warning: some language ahead is as shady as a scam call.

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