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Ridiculously Sexy Anastasia Ashley Goes On 'Naked and Afraid', Proceeds To Get Devoured By Pack of Hungry Insects

Well that settles it then, nothing is sacred anymore. Model/Surfer Anastasia Ashley went on the TV show Naked and Afraid and proceeded to have to tap out because the insects couldn't let one of nature's greatest gifts alone to enjoy the scenery.

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14 Depraved UrbanDictionary Sex Moves That We Absolutely Hope No One Has Ever Attempted

In all fairness here, these moves are hailing from the deep and notoriously darker depths of the creatively twisted Urban Dictionary. That said, I was still genuinely reeling in shock over the emotional and/or physical pain implied in these sex moves. Let's just say the descriptions alone didn't fail to set a new high (low) for what I thought possible as far as sexual experimentation goes. 

sex urban dictionary sex moves sexy times - 1648901
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13 People Divulge Strange and Crazy Chance Encounters That Ended Up Leading to Sex

Sex has a profound ability to cloud our judgment in a haze of something vaguely similar to terribly horny, blue-balled, sexually-frustrated teenage hormones, embrace our baser instincts, and enact with getting out there to do some ill-conceived 'things': things like blowing through budgets at bars like we're working through a bottomless bag of gold coins (and not subjecting ourselves to living off Top Ramen till next paycheck), surrounded by strangers, and just hoping we bump into that one chick that could be the one--that'll engage in conversation, at least. Or, enlisting ourselves for notoriously ridiculous dating apps like Tinder or Bumble that often times gives way to unforgettable crazy-coated conversations. And then, well, the opportunity for sex between consenting adults can just pop up in brilliant, unplanned fashion because you were there at the right time. These 13 people were lucky enough to fit the bill, get laid, not fail to round home base, etc, in one way or another.

sex strangers sexy times stories - 1620485
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Guy Matches With Hot, Sex-Crazed Tinder Chick Who Makes Most Ridiculous Fetish Requests We've Seen Since the App Was Created

What fresh hell is this? Sure, if that's actually her (and this isn't some perverse, bottom-feeding catfish at work) she clearly takes care of herself. And yeah, there's something to be said of the sexually fierce, if not experimental personalities when it comes to bedroom discourse; but bro, this is seven kinds of crazy, and outright ridiculous. The only reasonable course of action for our Tinder dude victim of the hour is to take his phone, toss it in the microwave, set to five minutes, and let it rip into a weird, fresh-fried memory of the past. 



crazy Fetish tinder sexy times dating - 1613573
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Well well, this is the best possible case scenario for a FAIL. She really flopped on this one, but fortunate for us, a couple friends came out to play in the process. If that was too ambiguous....BOOBS, guys. Does anything else in this particular outlandish situation really matter? Nah, dawg. Didn't think so. Not entirely sure what this foreign gameshow is after, but they've definitely got a lot of potential. A couple rising stars definitely caught my eye.

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People Theorize What It Would Be Like If Dr. Seuss Wrote Erotic Novels and Now Our Childhoods are Ruined

The internet has always done a fantastic job of destroying the things we hold dear. The very existence of rule 34 has left me with little in my life that has not been utterly ruined. 

Well, along comes this Ask Reddit thread to destroy dear old Dr. Seuss. Although, some of these don't quite fit into the classic Dr. Seuss pattern there are some truly amazing (terrible?) erotic poets lurking around. 

 I promise you, after reading these you'll never again be able to read Dr. Seuss without dirty rhymes floating through your head.

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