A California Bank Robbery Suspect Was "Told by the Virgin Mary" to Eat His Own Poop on the Witness Stand

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If there has ever been a reasonable case for a plea of insanity, maybe it's this one.

Andrew Gilbertson is charged with robbing a Bank of America in October 2013 - which is perhaps the first bullet point in an insane person. I mean come on, there are SO many easier illegal ways to get money in 2015. While taking the stand this Wednesday, he reached into his pants to grab his own personal brand for a snack, as instructed to him by the Virgin Mary herself.

Unsurprisingly, the court was called into a recess, where a mental health expert was called in to analyze Gilbertson's behavior.

Here's a video report of the full story, which thankfully does not feature any actual footage of the "One Disturbed Man, One Cup" incident:



Hat tip to Uproxx.

A Restaurant in North Carolina is in Deep Trouble After Accidentally Serving a 2 Year Old Booze

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The Gilliam family ordered cranberry juice for their toddler Gabriela, but when she took a sip they immediately noticed something was wrong. Taking a drink from her child's cup themselves, they discovered it was actually sangria (the preferred drink of college lit majors looking to forget that they need to read Joyce for Wednesday's class).

After several trips to local doctors and monitoring Gabriela's sleep patterns she's totally fine, but not after a tiny toddler bender ("She was kissing everything"). 

Hopefully she won't experience that kind of feeling again until college. Or at least late high school, who are we kidding.

Fail of the Day: Guy Busted for Using ‘Most Interesting Man in the World’ to Drive in HOV Lane

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There are lots of simple things you can do to get to work on time. This is not one of them.

A man in Washington was caught by state troopers using a cardboard cutout of the “Most Interesting Man in the World” from the Dos Equis ads as a passenger to fool authorities into letting him use the HOV lane.

Needless to say, it didn’t work, and he was fined.

Trooper Guy Gill Tweeted out the photo on Tuesday, giving the guy some props for trying.

“I don’t always violate the HOV lane law,” he wrote. “But when I do, I get a $124 ticket! We’ll give him an A for creativity!”

After being pulled over, the driver told the officer that the man was his “best friend.”

This might have been a big fail, but the real Dos Equis guy could have gotten away with it.

"Broad F***ing City," the Shirt That Kept a Southwest Airlines Flight on the Ground

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Well, the story is maybe a little more complicated than that. Daniel Podolsky was one of many people who picked up the shirt at Comedy Central's SXSW event. When he hopped on his flight home, he was told he would have to cover up or remove the offending shirt for the sake of other passengers before taking off. 

It's at this point that Podolsky escalates the issue and refused, leading to what can only be described as a titanic battle between corporate drone crone-iness and rampant pissant-ism. What happens when a tyrannical, mindless corporate travel agency is matched up against an ass who won't betray his principles for the sake of Getting This Damn Plane in the Air? Well, something like this.

Was anyone really in the wrong here? Does Southwest need to lighten up or this guy get his act together? Let us know in the comments!

A Woman Was Sent to a Psych Ward With $13,000 Medical Bills for Saying the President Follows Her on Twitter... and He Does

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Somehow the story is even worse than that sounds.

Kam Brock, @Akilahbrock, was pulled over by New York police and her car impounded when officers suspected she was driving under the influence of marijuana (none was found in the vehicle). After getting upset with officers and undergoing a medical evaluation, doctors thought she was suffering from a mental disorder - thinking her claims of being followed by Barack Obama on Twitter were bunk.

The only problem is that Barack Obama DOES follow @AkilahBrock, and around 640,000 other people. And now Brock is faced with thousands in medical bills after being sent to a facility. She's now pursuing legal action as a result of these stupid, insane events.

Check out a full video of the coverage here.