The terrorists win. Thanks a lot.

San Diego's Fourth of July 15-minute firework spectacular ending up lasting under a minute. Don't worry San Diego, we've all had that happen before.

"Red neck window. God bless America!"

Fun fact: This noble sea creature was going to be our National Animal until SOMEBODY decided that both the Freshwater Dolphin and the Wild American Turkey were inferior to the mighty Bald Eagle. Lame.

Summer's here! Sit back, relax, and enjoy A Cheezburger Summer!

Make sure to have a good wet, hot, American Cheezburger summer right here!

Remember kids, have a fun and safe Fourth of July. Don't do anything crazy like this guy - unless it makes for a totally sweet picture.

The Founding Fathers are much creepier than they were in the history books...