2/10, would not fawn over Tuxedo Mask with.

On the bottom here we have your standard-issue "stocky guy," and up top we have "out of shape dad." I have a feeling you'll be pleased with this hybrid model of beach bod!

And clearly you both needed some more sunscreen. Let that molting skin be a reminder that we didn't come to the Pearl Jam concert to see this.

Just don't double-dribble, big dude.

We won't judge if you want to do your Hulk impression in a tiny shirt. Go for it!

If the dress were any smaller, those would be on your chin, lady!

I have never been so happy to see a paunch in my entire life. Thank you, thank you for protecting us from that sight.