(We are Jewish. For those of you who don't know, it's a Christmas tradition for Jews to eat Chinese food and see a movie on Christmas, since there's nothing else to do. It's currently a week before Christmas, and we don't know what to eat.) Dad: Maybe we should do Chinese tonight instead of for Christmas. Mom: Honey, DON'T ruin my Christmas!

Me (7 Year old): Mom, what if aliens landed in the back yard, ate all our food, and left? Dad: Sounds like our relatives. Mom: (Glares at dad)