How to make yourself ‘undatable’

Chivalry may not be alive and well these days, but whatever has replaced it is, at the very least, entertaining. Well, it's entertaining if it's not happening to you, that is. Otherwise, it's just infuriating. However, that's the wonderful world of dating in the digital age. For those of us who are lucky enough to remember a time before dating apps, there were, in theory, far more romantic ways to meet someone. That being said, one could argue that human beings are by their very nature flawed a…

Dating is not easy, even when you know exactly what you're looking for. There are a bajillion single souls out there, but most of them just aren't going to be the one for you. One of the biggest issues I've encountered while dating is that people love to profile you based on your astrological profile. This is not something I want, and yet a lot of people want to know this info to see if we're compatible. Sadly, that means we aren't, right off the bat. Other people just ask weird questions on th…

According to the laws of probability, everyone is guaranteed to end up on at least one date with someone who is out of their mind or wildly misinformed. It's about as common as the probability of getting food poisoning. It's going to happen in your lifetime at least once… If you're lucky, you'll have the epiphany that the person sitting on the opposite side of the restaurant table is a moron before there are any notable strings attached. Ideally, you'll catch it on the first date so that neithe…

What's worse than having an awkward first date at a restaurant? Having one at a funeral.

When you propose to someone, it's a pretty big deal. There are some people who have dreamed their whole lives of having the perfect proposal in the perfect location with the perfect ring with the perfect person, and other people who could care less how they are proposed to, as long as it's with the right person. No matter what kind of proposal you hope to have, no one wants to be asked when they're not ready. So that's why if you're the one about to propose, you better make sure your fiance is…

Even the most jaded souls will smirk at the occasional extra cheesy pickup line. There is a kind of inescapable charm about the clever wordplay, the sometimes surprising yet strangely predictable punchlines, and the well-paced delivery. Of course, a good pickup line is always accompanied by someone who knows how to sell it. One has to wonder if folks who work in sales are the best at delivering pickup lines since they are used to dressing basic, underwhelming material up into something greater…

This woman wonders if her magic-loving husband is about to do a disappearing act with all of their money. One woman took to Reddit to ask for advice on a really bizarre situation brewing between her, her husband, and his friend Chris. It's a doozy. She's been with her husband for 8 years, and they have two young kids together, supported only by his income. But now her husband is insisting on following his dreams, probably thanks to a new friend. Now, let's break this down a little, because by t…

This person got back at their ex in a tiny but very irritating way. That's the way some relationships go: the couple breaks up, but they can't stop seeing each other. They get into a cycle of squabbling and making up, but that doesn't mean their relationship isn't toxic. u/ReSpekt5eva shared their story of dealing with an ex with whom they ended things, yet remained on friendly terms. They explained that this guy went to the same grad school they did, although he was a few years older than them…

Getting hit on is a part of daily life for many people. But obviously, you aren't going to want to date most of the strangers who are hitting on you in public: they're notoriously impolite about this. You quickly gain a sixth sense about these things. That man who's screaming from his balcony about how he'll treat you right… is not going to be the Prince Charming he believes himself to be. The dude who wolf-whistles at you as you're sweaty and lugging your heavy groceries inside is not really h…

Imagine this scenario… You want to do something nice for your partner, so you plan some time away with them. Even as a bonus, you organize and pay for their son to come too after plans fall through to have someone watch him. This is no short trip either; we're not talking about a three-day holiday over Memorial Day weekend or anything like that; we're talking about a full ten days. So, you book the tickets and pay for the accommodation—when you get there, your partner ditches you with their kid…

As summer approaches, people seem to getting more and more desperate on dating apps. Seriously, if these screenshots of dating app conversations serve as any indication, then it's quite clear that a lot of y'all are looking for something to materialize as soon as possible. That something could be a committed relationship, an uncommitted situationship, or something in that confused middle-ground territory a few bizarre people seem to enjoy. Many of these conversations include misinterpretations…

This guy was forced to confront a pizza delivery guy … because he tried to give a note to his girlfriend right in front of his eyes! Pizza delivery is supposed to be fast and simple. You place your order on an app or by calling the restaurant, the guy drops off your pizza a half hour later, and then you watch a movie while you chow down. It's supposed to be the easy dinner option. Apparently no one told that to this pizza delivery guy, who kept insisting on seeing the woman who lived at this pl…

Imagine you're waiting tables, scurrying around with hot plates, forcing a smile every time someone asks for some extra sauce. ‘Of course’, you say, and run to go get some… for the fifth time that night, for that table. Finally, a glimmer of relief, table 12 wants to pay. They'd been relatively great, smiled politely, said ‘please’, and hadn't bothered you. You'd even had good banter with them, so you expect they'll tip well. No luck, they don't even leave a tip… and their bill is just about $2…

What's your worst first date story? We all have one. Some people fumble before the date even ends, while others make their date uncomfortable after the fact. After that, read about the company CTO who demanded to “ see every line of code in this project ” after becoming suspicious of his coders.

The best way to get back at an ex involves personalizing your payback. It's one thing to post a bunch on social media about how much fun you're having and how much you've moved on since the breakup. It's also one thing to block someone outright. Those options might be petty, but they are also uninventive. What you really need to do, if payback is necessary, is to find something niche about your former partner and see if you can use that to your advantage. Now, payback is not pretty and it's not…