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Check This College Legend As He Pounds 13 Brews While Running a Sub-Two Hour Marathon

This guy is a monster. Everything about this screams impossible, but alas, some beer-guzzling boozehounds are destined for great things. 

beer drinking running amazing marathon win - 1934597
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15 Crazed Individuals Share Their Funniest, Most Ridiculous Blackout Stories In Time for Friday Funday

Not sure if these stories that accurately depict the wheels comin' off amidst the throes of a booze-charged bender headed for blackout station make me want to up and hoist a glass of something dangerously strong...or just, like never drink again. Maybe we can learn a little something from these clearly dysfunctional degenerates, or perhaps and most unfortunately, gather subconscious inspiration the next time we find ourselves going off the rails. 

drinking drunk blackout - 1852933
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Via Visitmex
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The age old sentiment when it rains, it pours just got a massive booze-infused upgrade, cause now it's apparently raining tequila. Yep, what a time to be alive, dudes. Better yet this odd nature-defying situation was not concocted by the mind behind that crazy little flick called 'Cloud With a Chance of Meatballs.'

Nope, in an effort to capitalize on Germans' general well-documented distaste for their consistent rainy weather and love of tequila, the Mexico-based ad agency Lapiz went ahead and started up with vibrating tequila at such high frequencies that it turns to mist, using ultrasonic humidifiers, and then as the mist condensates and reforms as a liquid, it proceeds to fall from the cloud as separate raindrops of sweet-distilled tequila. Ahem, anyone else out there thirsty? 

Via Fox News
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“Look, you’ve got to be warned here: what you’re about to see is beyond graphic, probably not appropriate for your kids. Three-two-one, go.” Based on that intro from Sean Hannity alone, you'd think you were gearing up for some stomach-turning, booze-soaked debauchery that amounted to at least half a frat getting arrested for blowing shit up or something. But nah, just the usual depraved beachside decadence.