(At a holiday gathering, a cheese plate is set out.)
Dad: Hey, honey, come here. Try this cheese.
Me: I don't really like blue cheese.
Dad: No, no, just try it.
Me: (Trying the cheese, disgusted.) Blugh, it tastes really weird. I don't like it.
Dad (pulls me aside): Your uncles and I all agree that that cheese tastes like our wives.
(My brother finally telling our parents he's gay.)
Mom: You can't be gay, you're not good looking and you have no fashion sense.
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