Me (on phone): Hi mom, I'm just calling to let you know I survived the dorm fire.
Me: Yeah, we had a fire last night!
Mom: Did you start it?
(talking to my mom about a project for school.)
Me: Yeah, so my teacher says I actually have to talk about an accident that happened in the past. Do you have any I could use?
Me: But that's my brother's name.
Mom: Like I said...
Don't Lie Now!
Neville Longbottom Scandalizes J.K. Rowling With His Huge ...
These are Disney's 5 Most Horrific Deaths
Wanna Make Your Anime Creepy? Just Add Avocados.
Introducing Specialman, With the Power of Abilities!
Cone Of Shame? You Mean My Perfect Water Feeder!
Time to Give Up on Humanity
Ryan Reynolds and Deadpool Make-A-Wish
Have You Ever Seen Your Death in Physical Form?
Someone Figured Out How Far Frodo and Sam Walked
Pick Your Site Name
Tell me more