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You stay hard while you're cooking and cleaning? You get turned on by the oddest things.

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7 Things Not to Do in Personals Ads

If you are a purveyor of the personals, than you may already be privy to these lessons. If not, follow our advice and avoid these common pitfalls.

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Ladies, please, I have very high standards. Applicants must be between 18 and 90, and anyone outside of that range will not be considered. I won't take just anyone.