Smiles Don't Count as "Explicit Physical Intimacy"

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Your Worst Fears Are True

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That moment when you're not sure if your housemates heard you having sex or not: you don't know whether they're acting awkward or not, and you're not sure whether you should act awkward or not.

People who aren't awkward don't have this problem, but I don't know anyone like this.

She's Just Anticipating the Next Time You Do Genuinely Screw Up

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In Some Ways, Guys Are Pretty Low-Maintenance

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Oh God Pudd'n Pops Delicious

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mmmmmmmmm YES YES YES OH GOD OH GOD OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhh

Sex: If You're Bad at It, It's Only for the Fittest

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Going Balls-Out for Hygiene

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Hopefully those numbers are percentages and you haven't actually recorded 100 of your ball-washings.