Abort, Abort! Abandon Party!

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abandon ship,leave,make out,Party,scared,sexy times
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No, Really, This Text is Way More Interesting

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bored,make out,Party,photobomb,texting,woo girls
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There must be something really interesting on his phone to keep him out of that action...

This is Becoming a Problem

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make out,alcohol,problem,venn diagram
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Nice Pants, Bro

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bro,bros,make out,spilled alcohol,wet pants
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Nice life, bro.

Scumbag Schlong

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drunk,hookup,made out,make out,socially awesome penguin,socially awkward awesome,socially awkward awesome penguin,socially awkward penguin,wasted
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Should've picked yourself up some of this stuff!

Crunk Critters: That Raccoon Has a Bandit Mask...

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crunk critters,girlfriend,make out,raccoon
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... because he's stealing your girlfriend.

To Be Fair, That Tree is Hawt

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WARNING: These bros use language that rightfully points out how far gone this poor lass must be.