Hah, like you can read Failblog for a living. Sorry, not currently hiring for that!

~Office Lackey Jack

Now if someone steals your smartphone, you're screwed beyond belief, but hey, that's not our problem!

We come quickly to your front door and get you wherever you need to go!

Two 32 oz. Gatorades for only three bucks!

In 2011, Christopher Woodring applied for a job at DreamWorks. After a few weeks, he hadn't heard back from them, so he sent them this video. He was subsequently banned by DreamWorks from working for them in any capacity ever.