With a certain sporting event (whose name is jealously guarded by the copyright lawyers of the NFL), comes the inevitable collection of commercials, the viewing of which has become a yearly event. The one we have here will tragically not be featured come Sunday, but is still worth seeing nonetheless for reasons that will soon be clear to you.

There's a Greg in our office, and this flowchart would work perfectly for him. Except it would be placed in front of the coffee, and instead of asking if he has permission, it would ask "Did you make the coffee? Have you ever made coffee? No? Then go away."

~OLJ

Better than waiting to be seated.

The next time you park like this, I have a custom made sign that I'll superglue to your windshield!

It gives the chance to run an update on my happiness system.

Now if it were a staple gun, that would be a whole different story.

I've got better questions to ask, like "who the hell thought that was a good name for a prescription drug?"

Very ungry indeed! Oh, Chinese knockoffs, we'll never get tired of you!

Now we're just rubbing it in.

~Office Lackey Jack