From the submitter:
My dad was told he had to fix the 25 foot tall skylight one hour before company came over, and this creature was born.
Shh, nobody tell him skylight's can be fixed from the roof.
Fewer than 400 channels?! Over my dead body! ~Not-So-Handy Andy
It's much better than that grill that made every one so sleepy they went to bed on the floor.
As a wise man once said, an escalator can never break...
On a completely unrelated matter, does it seem dizzy in here? ~Not-So-Handy Andy
Ah screw it, this month-old casserole isn't going to heat itself.
Good thing he left that wire hanging there, now it'll be easier to yank out with your bare hands.
Just one more way cigarettes will kill you.
Followed by a blurry statue, a blurry group of tourists and a blurry traffic light. Uh oh.
Also, I think one of my front tires may be flat. ~Not-So-Handy Andy
He watches you shower. Then he watches you die.