safety first

I don't know about you, but I tend to avoid wearing glasses that have loose wires pointing towards my retinas. ~Not-So-Handy Andy

Warning: turning on the air recirculation button will cause the universe to implode in on itself. ~Not-So-Handy Andy

So far I only have a 50% litigation rate. Could be worse.

~NSHA

See, everyone is useful after retirement. You just have to cut them in half first. ~Not-So-Handy Andy

But at least those clamps are lending their support. ~NSHA

At least his body lying unconscious on the floor will be easily spotted. ~Not-So-Handy Andy

A love letter from the submitter:

Dear HP, F*ck you and your $100 power cords.

Don't worry, if there's an earthquake you'll have the coolest helmet around.

~NSHA

Don't worry, the only things that can get through those are liquids and fire. You'll be FINE.

~NSHA

Just one more way cigarettes will kill you.

~NSHA

Ah screw it, this month-old casserole isn't going to heat itself.

~NSHA

Bonus points if you crash into a lake. ~Not-So-Handy Andy

Don't mind me, just seeing if your tubes are up to date.

~NSHA