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Twitter Thread: The Appalachians Are Older Than Most Things

Like this tumblr thread on the age of the Appalachians says, those mountains are older than bones. Not individual bones, but like the advent of bones. Alex Petrovnia gets into the geological wonder of a mountain range that spans continents and eras. It's weird how sometimes the most mundane things can be extremely interesting, like this thread on lobsters orthe electric story on the naming of Triscuits.

Twitter thread about the fossils found in Appalachian mountains, which are older than vertebrate animals
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The Most Disrespectful Houseguests People Have Had

Every person's house is a castle, and sometimes castles get put under siege. Whether it's the neighbor's horrible kid, a random dude who got in during a party, or a brother-in-law who needs to stay for one night for six months, we've all had moments that made us wonder "why do I ever let people in here." The bar never seems to hit rock bottom when it comes to the worst houseguests people have experienced. Sometimes distance isn't even enough in the case of people's worst neighbors.

stories of terrible houseguests
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Confusing Images Of Brain-Shaking Doubletakery

It's always good to have a reminder that your brain is dumb and can be tricked with a really minor adjustment of perspective. For example, these perspective-twisting images of doubletakery are good for an eye workout. Geese can look like spills, bugs become giant, and peoples limbs take on absurd proportions when double take moments of warped perspective come to town.

confusing images of warped perspective
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Misfortune Monday: That's How It Goes

Sometimes our lives feel like magnets for goofs, blunders, mistakes and errors. But luckily that's just sometimes. Unless of course you're the cause of all the spilled eggs, forklift crashes and exploded toilets in your life. Then we can't help you. But odds are, life is usually fine except for the odd misfortunate moments that intercept our usually okay lives. If there's ever a chance to look for some perspective it's on non-sequential but semi-regular Misfortune Mondays.

fails, mistakes and misfortune
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Random And Ridiculous Tumblr Gems To Fight The Clawing Boredom

Yeah, we have responsibilities and goals, but every day we all have moments of boredom that must be destroyed. Tumblr gemscan temporarily muffle the voice in all of our heads that screams "why am I here?" Sure it's only a temporary fix, but nothing is really permanent in life anyway. So we do our best with tumblr gems to quench the forever thirst.

funny tumble gems, memes, stories, and observations
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Incompetent Drivers Who Should Be Banned From The Road

The amount of actually qualified drivers on the road is shocking. It wouldn't be too stupid an idea to just start prying licenses out of people's idiotic hands. Sure, people would be be mad about it, but if you're the kind of idiot driver who finds yourself driving for an hour on rims or constantly has plywood flying off the back of your truck, just go be mad on the bus.

driving car fails
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Spooky Signs That Mean Serious Business

We live with more than a few cartoonish dangers in our world. There's loose monkeys, plants that only exist to inflict pain, and brain amoebas. There are cliffs, falling rocks, and every manner of potential electrocution. If not for these creepy signs that make their message clear, we'd be having that much harder a time. While terrifying signs are first and foremost helpful things, that doesn't mean they're not real spooky.

Scary and ominous warning signs
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Ominous Signs That Pump Up The Creepiness

Sure, some creepy signs can ruin the mood, but reading a sign that says "beware of flaming sinkhole" is a whole lot more convenient than falling into one and having all of your clothes burned off while your crush watches and laughs. Just kidding, you'd probably just burn to death. Anyway, the lesson is that we all have something to gain from terrifying signs that speak the language of fear.

scary weird and creepy warning signs
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Stupid Facepalm Moments Of Human Moronitude

No person is immune to moments of stupidity. With that said, for some of us it just comes in episodes and for others it's a lifelong, chronic condition. Facepalm moments of profound dumbitude give us a window into the confusing lives of our world's morons. It's gotta be rough being an idiot, but it's worse for everyone else who has to deal with the fallout of facepalm moments made possible by the brutally stupid.

facepalm moments of people being stupid
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Customer Demands Hotter Coffee, Manager Goes Full Throttle

This one honestly makes us a little nostalgic for our times working crazy jobs with people who didn't give a heck. There's a special place in our hearts for people who don't move like silent specters through the cogs of society, but make themselves seen and heard when a customer is being a real stick in the mud, like this boss who used an eye gag to get rid of some problem customers.

customer wants hot coffee, boss heats it up way too much
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Stupid Proof That Kids Are Almost a Different Species

Kids are dumb as rocks and weird as heck. These people are expected to one day become functioning members of society, but man, junk like this doesn't inspire confidence. Okay, maybe we should cut them a little slack. How much of a chance do you have at understanding reality when everyone in your social world keeps telling you Santa is real? Maybe it's not a mystery as to why kids are so strange and dumb.

funny moments of kids being stupid and weird
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Occupations People Are Sure No One Enjoys

We don't always have a ton of choice where we get to work, especially when you're just entering the working world. Find anything customer-facing and you'll have to deal with ridiculous customer demands. And don't think every good-looking job is perfect, because there are also those jobs that look easy or fun but are surprisingly difficult. With some jobs the work is alright but everyone else is horrible, in the case of these jobs people quit on the first day. In summary, it's rough out there, man.

horrible jobs almost nobody likes
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Weirdest Sandwiches That Sandwich Shop Workers Had To Make

Sandwich shop workers are on the frontlines of having to field some truly far fetched sandwich requests. If you've ever given yourself over to imagining the grossest possible sandwich combinations that you can imagine, just rest assured that there's definitely someone out there who is eating that very sandwich. Some people just have remarkably strange tastes. 

Sandwich shop workers describe the weirdest sandwiches that they ever had to make.
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25 "Not My Job" Moments of Radiant Unprofessionalism

Man, why are people always telling us to do stuff? Okay, maybe it's our bosses, and maybe they're telling us to do our jobs, but still. Why can't they be more chill? It's like they're begging for a handful of "not my job" moments of professional apathy to come creeping into the workplace. Not working is a great time, especially while at work. Yeah, it produces a few "not my job" moments, but still.

Funny lazy "not my job" moments
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In what looks like a criminal failure of public health, this reporter in Texas explains the danger of fecal coliforms the body of water behind him. The only issue being, there's a (hopefully metaphorical) buttload of people just chilling in that water. Is anyone gonna put up a sign or something?

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Random Tumblr Gems To Hack Through With A Machete

The land of Tumblr is one of intrigue, passion, and horribly stupid observations. Just one look at anonymous quips and gripes and we're off rifling through tumblr gems like a goblin. Do we ever really learn anything? Yes, for a second. Then it's gone again, pitched into the ether with so many other TILs and fancy curiosities. But there's no stopping the glowing aura of those sparkling tumblr gems uncovered from the deep.

funny tumblr gems
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