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Guy On Twitter Explains How To Avoid Boring Salads

Elan Gale, who is an author and producer best known for his work on The Bachelor, made some waves on Twitter for his helpful Twitter thread about how to avoid dull and boring salads. This could be just the kind of advice that people struggling to choke down that next flavorless salad so sorely needed. 

Helpful Twitter thread explains how to make salads taste better | tweet by elan gale @theyearofelan forgetting SEASON ingredients, acting like DRESSING is all matters. Cucumbers and tomatoes need SALT and PEPPER. Avocados need CITRUS. Act as if were going eat each ingredient individually
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Ways People Got Blocked By Famous People

Comedian Bert Kreischer started up a Twitter thread of people sharing the ways they ended up getting blocked by celebrities on Twitter. Some instances seem like the celebrities couldn't have had less of a sense of humor. Maybe they just get tired of the constant online trolling at a certain point though. 

Tweets from various people explaining how they got blocked by famous people | William Shatner @WilliamShatner blocked. vincesrocks Replying vincesrocks and @bertkreischer cause William Shatner @WilliamShat And am not guy green lit Eps 1-3! U Linda Sue @hyannis1952 Replying WilliamShatner This will get some annoyed Star Wars fans Vince @rottenzombiehug directed Star Trek V.
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Well-Constructed Putdowns And Savage Comebacks

Who doesn't love a fresh round of people getting destroyed by the power of brutal words, for the rest of the online world to see. Seems like some of these were warranted, while others could've been a total blindside. It's a wild west out there in the comments section, and you've got to keep your wits about you!

Various people getting ruined by words online | I was gonna tell Pizza joke, but theyre all too cheesy! If wanted joke box should ordered From pizza HUt. Don't know who needs hear this, but if brand is nice on Twitter and isn't paying person taking order living wage isn't nice brand. Burger King O @BurgerKing don't know who needs hear this, but if he's nice and isn't nice person taking his order, he's not nice person NationalBoyfriendDay
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Babysitter "Help Wanted" Ad Is Absolute Insanity

Shoutout to the folks at The Chive for discovering the goldmine of ridiculous human behavior that runs rife throughout this "help wanted" ad for a babysitter. Twitter user @honeystaysuper, unearthed just the kind of "help wanted" ad that leaves the rest of the world speechless. I don't even know where to start with this one. The attention to detail is honestly admirable. Nothing seems to be overlooked in terms of what constitutes a suitable babysitter. 

A "help wanted" ad for a babysitter is ridiculous with its extensive list of demands | tweet byKimberly Harrington @honeystaysuper Look know day is and where l'm posting this but still challenge find ANYTHING more bananas bat shit than THIS DARE. Assist 10-year old's with light homework long division, subtraction and writing. Play math games with them such as much fish should buy today five us and long will take us drive snow if 's 150 miles and go 50 miles an hour
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Colorado Sheriff's Department Breaks Brains With Boulder Description

A Colorado Sheriff's Department has rendered many brains scrambled after their strange description of a boulder. This is apparently no ordinary boulder. No, we're dealing with a boulder that escapes simple and definite descriptions. This boulder is actually a large boulder that is the size of a small boulder. Picture that real quick! Yeah, what's happening? 

A Colorado Sheriff's department inspires all kinds of hilarious reactions for ridiculous boulder description | San Miguel Sheriff @SheriffAlert Large boulder size small boulder is completely blocking east-bound lane Highway 145 mm78 at Silverpick Rd. Please use caution and watch emergency vehicles area.
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Infuriating Pet Peeves People Wish Were Illegal

Everyone's got that one pet peeve that sets them off like none other. It could be trying to coexist around people who refuse to acknowledge that many people don't like to exchange words before chugging their first cup of coffee. Or maybe you feel like it should be a law that you don't need to get up to tackle the day until your dog is ready to do so as well. Either way, you're bound to connect deeply with some of these. 

Tweets from people about their pet peeves that they believe should be outlawed | Marcus Smith @LegitBlackSmith #ThereShouldBeALaw makes illegal talk someone prior their first cup coffee.
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Clever Comebacks That Sealed The Deal

We're back at it again with a fresh collection of clever comebacks that left people in silence and utter ruin online. Sometimes the comments section just steps up to deliver a fine and entertaining show of savagery from the internet's most ruthless and quick-witted individuals. 

A collection of clever comebacks that left people speechless | if aren't real country if are dependent on tax dollars another country. think owe China around $1.1 trillion guess aren't real country?
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Twitter Thread on Random Brackets Is a Really Good Idea

If you're crap at conversation, nothing gets people involved and passionate quite like a semi-tongue-in-cheek debate on what kind of bird is best. Petty arguments are fantastic. Twitter user christineexists explained this admittedly great argument/party and apparently other people do it too.

Twitter thread on debate party idea | tweet by christineexists my friends routinely have bracket nights where pick 16 something tonight types chairs argue about them until crown winner
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Old Wives Tales Debunked (8 Tweets)

@DailyBlastLive is putting all those old wives tales on blast! Turns out stress can actually turn someone's hair gray, but the rest of the rumors you're about to read through get properly shut down. 

Various Old Wives Tales unpacked for not being true | Daily Blast LIVE DAILY BLAST LIVE dailyblastlive Eating chocolate does NOT cause acne s not chocolate itself s high fat and sugar candy general can change skin. Indulging chocolate bar time time won't give breakouts WivesTalesDebunked
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Awkward Moments People had with Celebrities

Seeing a star in person can have the effect of making you the stupidest person on the planet. Like, what do you say to a movie star if you're awkwardly blocking their way on an airplane? Seeing someone in person that you've seen in a movie, even someone you may not even particularly like, creates a scenario that most people just don't know how to deal with.

Twitter stories of awkward moments people had with stars | tweet by TheChangeU12C few years ago there period about 2 months where randomly ran into Whoopi Goldberg 3 different times various parts NYC first time she smiled at 2nd time she looked slightly confused 3rd time she looked slightly alarmed
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Clueless People In Dire Need Of Intelligence

These people are as clueless as they come. Some people would really benefit from saying a lot less, or nothing at all, online. 

A collection of ridiculously dumb moments from people on Facebook | kid my sister told paper strip thats chocolate kisses where edible and ate them w chocolate like year ili 4 they are WAIT REAL uli Replying why would believe this again. Canadians think titanic real event and not just movie dumb can. really hope kidding lol
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Woman Goes to Screening of Cats, Goes about as Well as it Should

The disastrous flop that was the movie Cats has given a lot of material to justifiably hate on, hence these random and hilarious observations on Cats as well as these funny one sentence reviews of Cats. @BrydieLK went to an outdoor screening and it went about as well as one would think.

Woman's Twitter story about going to Cats movie screening doesn't go well | tweet by Brydie Lee-Kennedy BrydieLK come an open air screening Cats and no one else is here. Update: 3 people and many many bats have joined us
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Lying Liars Getting Lit Up By The Truth

At this point, it's really just like the population of online liars get off on trying to sell people their various bits of BS.They've seemingly forgotten that we've got endless means at our disposal to deconstruct their lies, and things like "Google Reverse Image Search" help a lot too. When will the stupidity and dishonesty ever end? Uh, never. Clearly. 

Liars that got called out for spreading dishonesty online | Quit shit, this is 1000 PC at best. If actually managed spend 5k on got so ripped off 's not even funny Alexander Bro built peice by peice if u dont like get on Show parts list and managed spend 5k so can laugh at please 's 980ti god's sake Even 2080TI is only $1000.
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Twitter Users Share Their Dumbest Family Fights

People are sharing the dumbest fights that they've ever seen break out between family members. These might all serve as a solid reminder that there are very few limits to the kinds of dumb stuff that family members will squabble over. 

A collection of Twitter replies to people's dumbest family fights | tweet by StacWebbleHubbl My hubby and argue over whether or not underwear should be washed before being worn even called Fruit Loom customer service settle They are on my side and recommend washing 1st. He still disagrees dumbestfamilyfight
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Twitter Users Share Questions They Hate Being Asked

Twitter users are sharing those questions that they're just plain old tired of being asked. Some people really need to exercise a little bit more self awareness when it comes to things like asking questions before someone's had that first cup of coffee, or even worse, asking a question that could've easily been Google'd. 

A collection of Twitter replies to the questions that people are tired of being asked | tweet by PB_Cougar PB_Cougar hashtag IHateWhenPeopleAsk something they could have googled
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Funny Tweets as Sweet as Treats

If thoughts are birds, Twitter is the window they all fly into. Here are some funny tweets to make you think about all the weird and dumb thoughts people are having all around you every second of every day. As it turns out, our most strongly held opinions are the most minute, inconsequential ones.

Silly jokes from twitter | tweet by brendohare will have 4 blueberry muffins dinner please DUNKIN DONUTS CASHIER: Please do not tell us having them dinner
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