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Tumblr: a magical website with the bizarre, the hilarious and the unexpected. Think you've seen it all? Think again. The best one-liners, random threads and weird thoughts are yet to be discovered. 

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Tumblr Thread: Trees Are Strange And Kind Of Scary

This bizarre Tumblr thread explains some of the strange stuff trees do that we don't. It's vaguely unsettling, and it's also beautiful. That last part about the grafters putting fruiting branches on non-fruiting trees was a trip. 

Tumblr thread on all the weird things trees do that we don't.
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Tumblr Thread: "Mr Brightside" Gets The Star Wars Twist

This is a prime example of one of those Tumblr threads that's just a beautiful mess of witty brilliance. The widely known song, "Mr. Brightside" gets a Star Wars-inspired twist, and the results are gold. 

Tumblr thread gets a Star Wars-inspired twist.
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Tumblr Agrees Cats Talk like Disparaged Victorian Children

If you've ever seen a cat look at you with longing or desperate hatred in its eyes for the simple act of not petting it so much or only feeding it as much as usual, you'll get what this Tumblr thread is on about. Here are some Tumblr comedy gems to keep the day moving, as well as more nuggets of gold from Tumblr's busy brains.

Tumblr thread on how cats are needy and talk like disparaged victorian children.
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Employee Robs Museum To Call Out Lack Of Security

Literally, like a boss. Apparently, the story here goes in this particularly wild little Tumblr thread, that a boss' concerns about the museum's lack of security were being dismissed. So, the boss took matters into their own hands, and proved their point, by robbing the museum. Definite power play. 

Boss robs a museum to prove a point about the museum's lack of security.
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Tumblr User Imagines Horror Comedy, Stars Pizza Delivery Dude

Ah yes, another Tumblr user yet again proving why the world of Tumblr is full of countless comedic gems. It's a place that's filled to the brim with strange insights, and people falling down all kinds of weird rabbit holes. In this case, we've got a promising concept of a pizza delivery dude (apparently Rami Malek), who ends up navigating a world of different horror movies. Fun stuff.

Tumblr user imagines a horror comedy movie where a pizza delivery guy ends up in the middle of different movies | giveamadeuschohisownmovie Concept horror comedy about pizza delivery guy who has deliver several last minute pizzas on graveyard shift gimmick is each house he visits is middle another horror movie. Like first house has serial killer chasing guests next house is zombie outbreak next house has swamp monster, and so on. And all pizza delivery guy cares about is delivering pizza. Also,
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Tumblr Users Address Zombie Apocalypse Plot Holes

These Tumblr users make quick work of addressing some glaring plot holes in people's approaches to the zombie apocalypse, in various movies/shows. Like, what about that body armor? Is that a potential life hack if we ever find ourselves living in the middle of a zombie apocalypse. 

A brief Tumblr thread addresses the zombie apocalypse plot holes | kars-did-nothing-wrong why don't people zombie apocalypse stories ever just wear suits armor think any zombie is gonna get their rotting jaws through this? | gonna rip and tear my way through zombie apocalypse completely unharmed because none undead hoards will be able get through my plate mail kars-did-nothing-wrong everyone else is like "oh gotta stay inside most secure places possible and never leave" and l'll be storming
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Tumblr Thread On Bros Bonding Together To Use Brain Cells

This fun Tumblr thread highlights the ways that bros can bond together to accomplish seemingly simple tasks. By uniting brain cells and working together no mountain is too high for the bros to ascend. 

Tumblr thread on bros bonding together to use their brains | sandersstudies love genuinely innocent "boys will be boys Just saw guy come out frat house poke pair jeans they'd left outside they were frozen solid, and as soon as he confirmed like twenty more boys came rushing out house going "YOO00000000" rebelminds heard grunting outside my window other night and there were four boys struggling push this giant snowball (like 7 foot diameter) down sidewalk. snarling-through-our-smiles once lost my
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Facts And Fiction Collide In Fun "History" Thread

Sure, sometimes the truth is indeed stranger than fiction. That being said, we'd be very surprised if all these fun and absurd tidbits of "history knowledge" went on to be true. But hey, the world is a strange place, and human beings have acted out in all kinds of bizarre ways for a very long time. 

A ridiculous Tumblr list of unverified history knowledge | confirmance Follow S perks--being-chinese gilbertbielschmidt seduce with ur history knowledge simaraknows vikings made their woman handle finances because they thought math is witchcraft
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Tumblr Story: Guy Befriends Monster Under His Bed

This fun short story is just the best. The main character ends up befriending the very monster that lived underneath his bed. Apparently the monster followed him around, and ended up crashing in a spot under the fridge. From there, the friendship develops between the two, and we even see the monster step up in quite the heroic moment. Love it. 

A Tumblr story about a guy befriending the monster living under his bed | writing-prompt-s drop small piece food on floor, and decide kick under oven/couch/ whatever because can't be bothered pick up. As walking away hear very quiet "Thank under bethanythemartian "No problem say words passing out my mouth on autopilot, before my brain engages and freeze.
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Tumblr Thread: Radioactive Lava-Like Material Has Medusa Powers

This is one of those quick and informative Tumblr threads that is just brimming with absurdity. Apparently the world hatched this thing, which was labelled the "Elephant's Foot", and that ended up possessing literal "Medusa" powers. Specifically, that you couldn't stare at it directly without meeting your demise. Wild. And to make matters even more wild (somehow), a mold came along and started chowing down on the lava-like material. 

Tumblr thread describes a monster mold that has the powers of Medusa | unexplained-events photo above is closest humanity has ever come creating Medusa. If were look at this would die instantly | image is reactor core lava formation basement Chernobyl nuclear plant s called Elephant's Foot and weighs hundreds tons, but is only couple meters across. Oh, and regarding Medusa thing, this picture taken through mirror around corner hallway. Because wheeled camera they sent up take pictures destroyed
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Tumblr Thread Is Rich With Cake Baking Tips

This brief and helpful Tumblr thread breaks out the tips on how to bake that next glorious cake. Cake baking tricks are fun. 

A quick and helpful Tumblr thread shares various baking tips | docholligay Coming state champion baker: If y'all use decent box mix and use melted butter instead vegetable oil, an extra egg, and milk instead water, no one can tell difference sure as hell can't. Also, if add little almond extract vanilla cake, or little coffee chocolate cake sends through roof. This concludes attempting be helpful.
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Short Tumblr Thread On Places That Jokingly "Don't Exist"

When it comes to inside jokes among countries, it's actually fairly common to have a running gag about a town or place that doesn't exist. Tumblr hatches nuggets of gold from its busy brains, like this tumblr thread that makes history fun.

Tumblr thread on places people say don't exist as a joke | Germans have running gag where they pretend town Bielefeld does not exist. Even Angela Merkel talked about meeting she had Bielefeld, she added:.if exists at all Bielefeld has even released statement insisting= their existence, but unknowing. ly published on April 1. memeguy-com Why should Germans be only ones having this kind fun Fellow citizens United States nominate Wyoming abessinier Ladies and gentlemen present Bielefeld Conspiracy
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Tumblr Thread: The Bizarre Nature Of Sci-Fi Translation

This fun Tumblr thread points out the strange and confusing nature of translating, on a galaxy-wide kind of scale. Specifically, how it could end up being quite the absurd process trying to list various deserts to a visiting alien, when they all end up translating to "desert desert." So, maybe humanity is "moon moon" then. 

Brief Tumblr thread points out the strange nature of Sci-fi translation | alice-and-cheshire-cat Follow foone Follow @Foone Here's question always have with universal translators sci-fi do they know stop translation? Like say an alien asks about deserts on earth, and human lists sahara desert, gobi desert and kalahari desert" Alien just said "desert" six times.
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Tumblr List: Grandpa Brings Home Bizarre Animals

This Tumblr list captures all the bizarre animals that Grandpa brought home over the span of his 67 year marriage to grandma. Clearly Grandpa enjoys a life of unpredictability, which would seem to have translated to the guy showing up at home with all kinds of unexpected, wild animals. 

Tumblr user shares an incomplete list of all the weird animals a grandpa brought home | gallusrostromegalus An Incomplete List Animals my Grandpa brought home over course his 67-year marriage Gandma Annabell solid white and completely deaf pit bull used let mom draw on her belly World's Ugliest Tom Cat, who turned out be cuddiest teddy bear an animal | Cocker spaniel named "Captain" Stupid Cat Litter baby raccoons Three more cats completely bald and extremely anxious canary sang beautifully, but
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Supportive Tumblr Thread On Dealing With Invasive Thoughts

Assigning silly identities and voices to those various thought streams that might pop up as invasive, and with a dark tone around them, can be helpful in riding out the process back toward peace. If you're able to step outside the thought when it pops up, recognize it as that, and not identify with the thought, it can almost end up being a game of sorts. Is the conspiracy theorist with the panicked strain piping up again from the back corridors of your mind? Maybe. 

Tumblr thread provides advice on dealing with intrusive thoughts | bulbubsaur Pretend ur invasive self hating thoughts r being said u by 13 y/o boy on xbox live trying get rise out like girlfriend dumped because ugly s nice tim isn't past ur bedtime autistictesla also, if have intrusive violent thoughts, pretend they're being said u by an annoying backseat driver "drive into pole" thanks karen or could not do
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Tumblr User Calculates Ash Ketchum's Superhuman Strength

Yay, more Tumblr gems. Here we are again with Tumblr doing what it does best: running the numbers on things we'd never expect to see someone making calculations for. Yes, we're talking about how it turns out that Ash Ketchum's rocking some kind of superhuman strength. Apparently as a 10-year-old, the kid is able to toss a log that weighs over 1,000 pounds. Okay, Ash. I see you. 

Tumblr user calculates Ash Ketchum's insane, superhuman strength | tabbibeard does he even let team rocket steal his pikachu at this point he could break their sternums with his index finger pokemontrainerstorm REGRET EVERY INSULT EVER SAID ABOUT ASH MY LIFE mattysones heard ash ketchum has an 8 pack ash ketchum is shredded
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