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Dumbest Things That People Ever Said

We all have our unfortunate, humbling moments where the ego itself can't stand to exist in the face of unexplainable, self-created dumbness. Maybe these people's stories about the dumbest things that they ever said will make you feel better about your own cringeworthy moments that still manage to haunt you at night when you'd otherwise be catching a great night's rest. 

A collection of the dumbest things that people ever found themselves saying.
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Safety-Failures That Would Make OSHA Weep

Physical work can place us in some compromising positions. It's probably not worth it to straddle two ladders in the wind or pull some OSHA-defying boldness just so you can finish a job 20 minutes faster, but it's everyone's personal choice to risk your life for a few dollars. What really sucks is when you are aware of basic safety standards and your boss says "listen buddy, we've been storing oily rags next to the fritzy boiler for years, so quit being a pansy. Now grease up your hands and plunge them into the crusher." So here's to misguided safety failures that OSHA would disapprove of

absurd safety failures
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Landlord Refuses To Return Deposit, Gets Taken To Court, Appeals, Loses Everything

This isn't the first time we've come across a rather gnarly landlord situation, and we're sure that it won't be the last time. There's something about far too many landlords in this world that ends up involving them getting all kinds of greedy. It's as if they make this sweeping assumption that their tenants don't know their rights, and won't do the necessary homework to ensure that those rights are upheld. Well, this tale of pro revenge that involves a landlord definitely has a happy ending. We love to see it. 

Landlord refuses to return a tenant's deposit, gets taken to court, appeals, and then loses everything.
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In-Laws Want To Know Man's Income, He Calls Them Gold Diggers

Some people really don't like to talk about their finances. Other people fail to pick up on those social cues when they're glaringly present. Hence, an environment that'd otherwise be nice and peaceful can quickly give way to a spicy situation like the one we have here. Were there other potentially more amicable ways that this guy could've addressed his in-laws aggressive nosiness? Sure. But even then, it was pretty bold on their part, and it seems like most of the moral judges back in the comments section were in agreement that he wasn't in the wrong for snapping back at them. 

Man's in-laws ask about his income, and he proceeds to call them gold diggers.
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Choosing Beggar Wants iPad For $40 And Free Delivery

Man, these kind of interactions between the choosing beggars of the world and the sane individuals just trying to make a buck without dealing with full on delusional fools really sap our faith in humanity. This choosing beggar really needs to reassess their approach to life. 

Check out another case of a particularly gnarly choosing beggar who expected to pay for a painting with a prayer.

Choosing beggar wants an iPad for $40 and expects free three-hour delivery | only have 40 asked if u can do 40 simple yes or no could do but guess ik answer! Oh assumed meant an extra $40 delivery. No offense, but mean, if were selling something would take less than were asking AND drive over 3 hours? U said e hour and half u? Yeah each way, so over 3 hours round trip
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Entitled Boyfriend Starts Eating Birthday Cake Before Party Even Happens

It doesn't really matter what your personal beliefs about birthdays are, you don't exactly get to dictate other people's values after taking their stuff. Also, it's pretty safe to assume that eating a piece out of a kid's birthday cake before the candles go on isn't going to be taken as a minor inconvenience. Cake drama is real, like this entitled coworker who demanded a cake and issued threats, or this one pound cake Karen who was furious after getting what she wanted.

entitled boyfriend eats cake before birthday starts
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Meals People Made With Hatred, Not Love

It's a totally ubiquitous thing to say. "Why is this lasagna so good? Well of course, it's made with love." Well sometimes food is not made with love. Sometimes cursed food abominations make it obvious that there was something else in there. It stands to reason that if love can exist as an ingredient, hatred must exist as well. Sometimes it's a combination of apathy and incompetence in the case of horrible things people ate out of politeness, but other times, all it takes is a tablespoon of hatred.

food where the secret ingredient is not love but hatred
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Facepalm Moments Of Profound Dumbitude

It's really easy to think that people are smart and responsible in general. But the more people you meet, the more you realize that we're barely holding it together. Life is just brimming with facepalms deep fried in stupidity. It's an absolute miracle that most of us can manage to hold down a job, feed ourselves, and not just sit around all day hitting ourselves with hammers. So go on and expose yourself to the gamma rays of facepalming, mystifying dumbness.

stupid funny facepalm moments
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Power-Tripping Manager Tells Employee To Not Do Their Job, Backfires Terribly

It's a wonder that some people are put into the positions of power that they are in the first place. Fortunately, the pattern seems to be consistent in that they don't last long in their roles of authority. At one point or another the incompetence ends up creating such chaos and destruction that the businesses have to let them go. It sounds like this particular manager was just biding their time until they ended up failing so hard that the only acceptable outcome would be their righteous termination. For some more juicy malicious compliance drama check out the story about this woman who claimed she was on a salt-free diet, and then got exposed

Incompetent manager on a power trip tells their employee to not do their job, and it backfires terribly.
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Entitled Coworker Demands Free Cake, Gets Denied, Issues Threats

It's hard to fully digest the fact that these kinds of people actually exist. You've got to wonder where all the dizzying entitlement really took root. Was it nurtured from a young age, or did it present its ugly face sometime later in life? In the case of this employee, it seems like it's a bit of a lose-lose situation based off their impossibly testy and disrespectful attitude. And then the fact that they have the audacity to issue threats at the end there. Pretty unreal. Check out more entitled people with their fantastical demands over here

An entitled employee asks coworker for free cake, gets denied, issues threats.
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Worst Business Decisions People Have Ever Seen

Unfortunately a reality of being human is that there will come various times when your judgment is seemingly chucked right out the window. Hopefully, when this happens you don't find yourself in a position of power where you're being held responsible for the very health of a business. Or, maybe if you've already suffered a self-created business blunder of your own, then these fails will make you feel a bit better about whatever cringe from the past keeps you up at night. 

People describe the absolute worst business decisions that they've ever encountered.
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AskReddit Thread: Red Flags For Problem Roommates

The last thing that you or anyone else wants to find themselves confronting is the grim realization that the new roommate is a literal waking nightmare. Unfortunately, it seems like so often some of the world's most insufferable human beings are that much better at putting on a whole carefully practiced act when it comes to tricking people into thinking that they're nice human beings. Hopefully this AskReddit thread that's filled with red flags for troublesome roommates will be all the information you ever need to never find yourself in hot water with a nasty roommate. 

People describe red flags that they picked up on for problem roommates.
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Highly Literal Moments of Technical Accuracy

We all like to think of ourselves as basically intelligent people. Does that mean that we're completely right about everything all the time? No, not really. We have the capacity to be right about most things, but the reality of knowing things is that it takes a lot of research. Why be totally correct when with a lot less effort we can be technically accurate and not incorrect? Empirical accuracy takes a second seat to the convenience of technically correct cleverness.

funny memes and jokes that are technically accurate and not wrong
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Secret Shopper Karen Is Too Much of A Karen, Gets Fired

Working retail comes with a very special set of gripes unlike any other job. The entitled customers, utter Karens and bored scamming shoppers leave retail employees with a hollow dissatisfaction that makes one wonder if there are any sane people left on the planet. Secret or mystery shoppers are one of those interesting speed bumps that you wouldn't think would be infiltrated by the forces of Karenhood, but lo and behold, here we are.

Customer service stands up to Karen secret shopper, then she gets fired
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Twitter Thread: Guy Details Ridiculous Skyrim Adventures

It's an emotional rollercoaster of a story like the one that we have here that can really encourage someone to try their hand at a video game that they'd otherwise rain check on. Of course, this is Skyrim that we're talking about. If you've ever played Skyrim before you're probably very familiar with the fact that the game can inspire all kinds of ridiculous nonsense. Those side quests are something else, man. 

A very entertaining Twitter thread about a guy's crazy Skyrim adventures.
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Craziest Things People Did During Divorces

Love already inspires people to do some truly crazy stuff, but when you factor in what can happen when a once loving relationship runs its course, and divorce ends up being the outcome....oh boy, can things get hairy very quickly. Some folks that have weathered the profound emotional toll that can be muddling through a divorce, just end up completely losing their minds. You can only hope that people don't ultimately take things too far, but that can't necessarily be said for some of the people in this thread. 

People describe the absolute craziest things that they ever did after divorces.
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