food

These pizza delivery drivers have seen it all; they've seen the darkest sides of humanity. It's as if a pizza delivery driver is a guardian angel of sorts. They show up to bring hot steaming boxes of pizza to the lost and burned out souls, who might've needed someone to check in on them more than the actual pizza. The following stories are pretty gnarly. You might walk away from this list, with a different appreciation for all the messed up kinds of madness a pizza delivery driver has seen in their time. 

If you're in the mood for more pizza delivery madness, check out the time a Domino's pizza tracker saved a guy from his knife-wielding ex, over here!

Tumblr never disappoints with the weird, specific and overthought pieces of gold, like this mathematical deduction of and Ice Cube Song. Anyway, here's a story of the time a contortionist friend did everything in her power to get a burrito. The results are pretty fantastic.

Waiters and waitresses have that outside-in perspective when it comes to you entering their domain, to take a chance at meeting someone for your first date. Those sporadic conversations you have with your date, consisting of information you'd already know if the other person was a consistent part of your life, are a giveaway. But at the same time, things aren't always as they appear. Maybe you're reading this as someone who's in a loving relationship, and realizing you might look like you're on a first date with your partner, every time you guys go out! 

"I'm watching natural selection happen in real time." A woman's coworker brings raw chicken to the office, and fortunately for us, she was ready to live tweet the harrowing experience. All becomes undone, as stomachs wrestle what sounds like a solid case of food poisoning. 

Dammit Carol, that bacon is more pink and raw than a chapped ass, those eggs look like they've been fried on a sidewalk and the beans are sadder than a racehorse with a broken leg.

If is wasn't obvious by now, make sure your creation is worth reviewing when you submit it for public ridicule.

Sometimes the fine print won't even help you. These immoral businesses tried to swindle customers with misleading bait and switch tactics, as well as comically strange lying strategies. We could give them credit for being clever, but we don't want to.

When the choosing beggar meets your sanely delayed text responses with a blatant and blind disregard for all the sh*t you have going on in your life....let them eat CAKE. This is pure and sweet-tasting justice. Warms the heart really. 

Not much compares to a poorly designed masterpiece of stupid. One man's mistake at work is another man's sweet, scrumptious fail. We love seeing all the fruits of the world's strange coincidences, laziness and poor judgement. When they're unintentionally filthy, that makes them even better. And holy crap, these seem to happen a lot.

You might find yourself grinding your teeth halfway through this list, without realizing it, and that is a perfectly rational reaction. Cause these are the infuriating opposite of those oddly satisfying images that'll occasionally grace our news feeds. 

Some of this stuff looks absolutely delicious, but watch out, it's probably an inedible gemstone. The people at r/forbiddensnacks are very serious about finding all the delicious looking non-food objects in our world, and can you blame them? These molds, landscapes and cleaning products look great.

Radio host Sam Sanders asked his fellow twitter users what kind of strange delicacies they created for themselves as children. The results were, really, pretty gross. Lots of peanut butter, ketchup, kraft singles and coca powder went into these people's upbringings. And not necessarily in separate dishes either.