news

It's a story as old as time: Woman gets mad at bad parking job, woman stuffs banana in car's tailpipe, woman writes angry note then gets arrested for damaging said car. It's all pretty poetic, really.

That's David Menzies right there. Mezies had a plan so simple it was stupid: Test drive a new Jeep, smash and grab some goods from a bike store, then drive off with his new vehicle.

What he didn't think too much about was that the store he wanted to rob was right next to the Hammerfist Krav Maga school. That's where co-owner Jason Carrio comes in. 

Carrio attempted to call the police, but when it was clear that Menzies was about to make away with the bikes and goods, he ripped him out of his vehicle and subdued him until authorities arrived. A pretty ballsy move!

Almost as ballsy as trying to conduct a robbery next to a bunch of trained martial artists.

The interview proper starts about 30 seconds in. Stay tuned until the end for more of who is clearly the prophet of our times.

Hide yo kids, hide wives, hide yo husbands, and definitely hide yo grandmas. The only way we could make this very real life story of a reindeer running amok through the tea-soaked streets of a temporarily improper Nottingham, is if Arnold Shwarzznegger reprised his role from Jingle All The Way, to catch the runaway reindeer.

Somebody must've slipped something in Bjorn the reindeer's eggnog Sunday, because he went buckwild.

"I was putting some Christmas cards up in the window and just saw it come charging down the street," local resident Gemma Green told the Nottingham Post. "Then I saw a group of people following it.

"It was quite strange. It's like the scene from Arthur Christmas where Santa loses his reindeer. I thought I was seeing things at first." Maybe she was, but heck if that's a way to spur some Christmas spirit.