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Tumblr: a magical website with the bizarre, the hilarious and the unexpected. Think you've seen it all? Think again. The best one-liners, random threads and weird thoughts are yet to be discovered. 

You Almost Don't Have to Read the Words

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Via f**kyeahalbuquerque

Thank God For That Second Tap to Skip

Thank God For That Second Tap to Skip
Via onlytp
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Still a Great Source of Vitamins

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Via Heizenburge

Try Again Later, Kid!

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Via Acid Cow

Most Terrifying Email Ever

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Via and-down-we-go
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The Magical Disappearing Butt-Scope

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Created by ToolBee
Tumblr Thread on Patrol Ghost Ship Submarines | pipistrellus STILL ON PATROL learned something new and horrifying today which is no submarine is ever considered "lost there is apparently tradition U.S. Navy no submarine is ever lost. Those go sea and do not return are considered be "still on patrol There is monument about this along canal near here its worst thing have ever seen says "STILL ON PATROL huge letters and then goes on specify exactly many WWII submarine ghosts are STILL OUT THERE

Tumblr Thread: The Still On-Patrol Submarines

Yeah, that's wild.
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You Should Know Better

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Created by Unknown
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When You Text, You Don't Have to Turn the Xbox Off

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Canada: America's Quiet, Cooler Sibling

Text - the-random-thought-caravan: apocalypse-aradia glorious-randomness: anderlynn I always think of Canada as the lovechild of England and France after they had a drunken one night stand and England just left it to grow up with its big brother America who was like the rebel of the family this is 100% definitely what happened. and canada wanted to be exactly like america but ended up being the nicer one who makes friends with everyone easily trudat 194,248 notes
Via Acid Cow

Getting Back at the Magic Nerds

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Via seekerofshells
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They're Lucky She Didn't Do the Same With The Tip

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Funny tumblr moments | pteapotdactyl weareallfromearth Follow getlitaesthetic Follow Today 10:12 want 6 pet sloths so can name them after every sin except sloth Today my wife texted this, and then immediately called make sure got because an urgent message Source

Random Funny Tumblr Gems to Fill Those Pockets

Oh, that hits the spot.
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All Ur Bloge Are Belogn 2 Us

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A funny Tumblr post about a strange horticultural technique that flattens trees | biggest-gaudiest-patronuses Seguir recently learned about horticultural technique called Espalier s funniest goddamn thing ever seen.

Tumblr Thread: Strange Horticultural Technique Is Terraria IRL

Flat trees are our new favorite trees.
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A quick Tumblr post highlights how forgetful human beings can be | andhumanslovedstories started using Head and Shoulders ten years ago itchy scalp and dandruff, and then ten years have not had itchy scalp and dandruff, so thought "why do still buy shampoo combat itchy scalp and dandruff do not have itchy scalp and dandruff so stopped buying shampoo itchy scalp and dandruff and can guess have now? Can predict currently afflicts s alright if can't because apparently fuckin couldn't either

Quick Tumblr Post On Humans' Willful Ignorance

We all can get so horribly forgetful.
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