While this looks cool, there's no way it would work without getting sauce all over your hands or constantly awkwardly readjusting it every 2 seconds.
~Not-So-Handy Cynical Andy
Sometimes after a long day, you just need pizza. But then again, who has room in the shop for a kitchen table?
Except use a knife.
You couldn't leave well enough alone, could you? You had to attempt to combine the world's greatest game with a world's greatest food. You flew too close to the sun, my friend.