In the Words of Mitch Hedberg...

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canned food,FAIL,there I fixed it,mitch hedberg,g rated
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...I opened it once, and it still ain't open.

Which Way Does it Open?

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doors,FAIL,handles,there I fixed it
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In case of a zombie apocalypse, just charge on through.

There, I Baked It

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cake,funny,there I fixed it,pumpkins,FAIL,halloween
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This was supposed to look like a pumpkin...the instructions in the magazine left much to be desired. See more tricky treats at Cheezburger's Halloween site!