(Mom upon opening her package of syringes she ordered for nursing purposes)
Mom: Sweet, they got here early!
Me: Why do you even...
Mom: Practice, now get over here and let's find a vein.
Me: ... How about no.
Mom: Oh, that's alright then. You have to sleep eventually.
Dad: After dinner mint?
Me: That's a Halls cough drop...
Dad: So? After dinner mint.
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