Millions of hard to open peaches, peaches for me.
Don't you know what he's done to your family???
Metric water? Not in my country!
Because one morning you'll wake up and realize this is the most effective way to get rid of your Nickelback discography.
I know I had to give up on my dream of fixing ATVs to become a lowly neurosurgeon, but that doesn't mean I can't force my son to lead the life that I wanted.
Your dad will swap your bed riser with his jack and make you work on the car. Good luck.
I was trying to come up with a third pun in the caption, but I think the title is cringe-worthy enough. What do you guys have?
Oh, he still had a hinge. But it was ten feet away and the screwdriver was literally right there. ~NSHA
Celebrate our independence by putting the founding fathers to good use!
He'll always stay there, but he might take a bite or two out of your coat. ~NSHA
Please, please tell me this is a kludged flamethrower made of plastic. ~Not-So-Handy Andy
You squeeze every last drop out, because your mother told you not to waste. ~Not-So-Handy Andy