"But we're family! You have to let us take it out when you're not using it!"

So what exactly is a para-social relationship? Urban Dictionary might describe it as a sex move that involves an entire parachute. But really it has to do with convincing yourself that you actually have a personal relationship with a celebrity or bit of mass media that has no idea you exist. Sort of like this interaction right now, but not really. Because that would imply that you actually like us, which is not a terrifically solid claim. Where this might apply here is that when we read other p…

Absolutely absurd.

Nope, that's not how it works.

Leave out those emojis.

When our phones just don't work for us.

Wow man, get out of here with that noise.

Oh boy, they handled that beautifully.

Keep up, my dude.

Gave them a righteous taste of their own medicine.

Yeah, not a bright idea at all.

Oh dear.

What a messy situation.

Precious time wasted.

My dude, it's not going to work out.

They don't mean to sound passive aggressive.