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Funny tweets from the Lawrence Police Department on Twitter | Lawrence Police @LawrenceKS_PD Is 20 tubes disinfectant wipes reasonable amount 600 sq ft apartment is not reasonable amount should not buy many tubes. Maybe just one or two? been 38 minutes since told wash hands and had hands all over germ infested phone reading tweets. Wash hands, wipe down phone, and return some TP store. And don't crime.

Comedy Gems From Lawrence Police Department's Twitter

A collection of times that troll, Ken M, toyed with people online | Ken M @horseysurprise 's oddly cathartic realize l'l never be able pay off my student loan borrowed $400 student

Times Troublemaker Ken M Toyed With People

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A collection of funny tweets from Ryan Reynolds on Twitter | Ryan Reynolds @VancityReynolds Nothing better than spending an entire morning staring into my baby daughter's eyes, whispering can't do this

Comedy Gold From Twitter King, Ryan Reynolds

A Twitter thread about a dude discovering an awesome, ancient computer | LOCKED John Pfaff @JohnFPfaff 10h Oh God. An Apple lle. Sat my parents' attic years. Decades. And works. Put an old game disk. Asks if want restore saved game. And finds one must be 30 years old 10 years old again

Twitter Thread: Man Discovers Ancient Computer

People who destroyed themselves by trying to insult someone else on social media | Patricia @patriciarose_ Replying MaxZatlin Anyone who can't spell or use punctuation is no poisition questions people's intelligence.

People That Hit Their Own Self-Destruct Buttons

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A Twitter thread about a student looking up their impactful teacher on Twitter | Raifa Rafiq @RaifaRafiq OMFG! Guys. There literally teacher at school who loved so dearly (English teacher she left year 10) and don't even know why but randomly decided do internet stalkies because l've always wanted find her and thank her because gosh l love her.

Twitter Thread: Student Finds Life Changing Teacher On Twitter

A collection of clever comebacks from spicy silvertongues | Mikey why are so sad? There's so much goodness world don't know Ava why do have asthma there's so much air world

Radical Retorts From Clever Wordsmiths

A woman shares a powerful Twitter thread on prison visit struggles that people encounter | Liliana Segura @LilianaSegura Yesterday accompanied woman see her loved one prison left before dawn make AM visit. Several hours later were headed back home, our visit denied wanted share bit about experience.

Woman Shares Powerful Twitter Thread On Prison Visit Struggles

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A collection of tweets that represent what the Midwestern lifestyle is like | WIDWEST Midwest vs Everybody @midwestern_ope OPE Name an extreme Midwest sport corn gets so tall can't see oncoming traffic at intersection

Tweets About That Midwestern Life

A Twitter thread about a teacher handling a non English speaking student | As formerly non-English speaking immigrant, here is story cherish s 1997 just moved Korea Los Angeles area took regular English courses Korea, and good enough get out ESL classes and into regular 10th grade classes.

Twitter Thread: English Teacher Meets Foreign Student With Understanding

bragging people who think they're smart | My IQ is 198 only converse with individuals who's IQ is above 165, so if yours is lower than then not worthy talking If like acquire privilege being able talk need do extensive research on multiple complicated topics even reach bare minimum people who will talk whose not who's

Bragging Mind Lords Who Think They're Geniuses

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Twitter thread about a woman's experience getting lump removed in Iceland | Mary Robinette Kowal e @MaryRobinette lived lIceland found lump. Ihad no idea navigate finding doctor, so went our show's production manager found lump. Can help find doctor? PM: Just go cancer center Okay do get referral? PM s referral?

Twitter Thread: Woman Discovers Lump, Iceland's Healthcare Pulls Through

A Twitter thread about the importance of science and technology education | Sulka Haro @sulka think Clarke's Third Law Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable magic" has emerged full force during last 10 years and its having profound effect on society thread:

Twitter Thread: Importance Of Science And Technology Education

A collection of creative insults that rocked people to their very core | INSIDE ASTER edition INSIDE edition ASiTicn antonio perez donut shop owner looks like homeless jimmy Fallon man with long scraggly hair tv interview

Rare Insults That Rocked People To Their Core

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Woman ends up learning that steak is in fact beef | Abena Darkoa @allADUiswin Y'all yesterday found out steak is beef and so embarrassed say animal thought steak all this time

Woman Discovers That Steak Is In Fact Beef

Man manages to dodge a speeding ticket using fart spray | JJ @FiretheGm Soooo got pulled over this morning after leaving McDonald's.l already knew why he got speeding) but course gonna ask him why he stopped decided try my luck got fart spray as gag gift on xmas and decided try out

Man Dodges Speeding Ticket With Fart Spray

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Neighbor tries to evict homeowner from their own driveway by putting up a ‘tow away zone’ sign, homeowner parks there anyway, tow driver refuses to get involved: ‘I knew it was going to escalate’

Neighbor tries to evict homeowner from their own driveway by putting up a ‘tow away zone’ sign, homeowner parks there anyway, tow driver refuses to get involved: ‘I knew it was going to escalate’

Company forces employees to work from the office full-time, leading employees to stop replying to messages after hours despite manager's demands: ‘You get exactly what you ask for'

Company forces employees to work from the office full-time, leading employees to stop replying to messages after hours despite manager's demands: ‘You get exactly what you ask for'

Software developer complies with management's demand to stop helping users with system issues, leading to a lack of help desk: ‘That did not go well for the users’

Software developer complies with management's demand to stop helping users with system issues, leading to a lack of help desk: ‘That did not go well for the users’

Identical twin sister decides to start a life of her own after her parents encouraged an unhealthy, codependent familial relationship for years, family implodes as a result: ‘I just can't be enmeshed with her for the rest of my life’

Identical twin sister decides to start a life of her own after her parents encouraged an unhealthy, codependent familial relationship for years, family implodes as a result: ‘I just can't be enmeshed with her for the rest of my life’

A Midday Lunch of 26 Brown-Bagged Funnies to Get You Through the Workday (September 15, 2025)

A Midday Lunch of 26 Brown-Bagged Funnies to Get You Through the Workday (September 15, 2025)

Responsible husband refuses his stay-at-home wife's request to buy a new car, after just paying off their mortgage and demanding they save for retirement and kids' college instead, tells her to get a job if she wants the car: ‘She said I was a cheapskate’

Responsible husband refuses his stay-at-home wife's request to buy a new car, after just paying off their mortgage and demanding they save for retirement and kids' college instead, tells her to get a job if she wants the car: ‘She said I was a cheapskate’

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