bikini

A list of our grievances with your Etsy listing:

1. It's obvious you love your body, and that's great, especially after it's been through at least one pregnancy and labor. But you're on a site for selling handmade craft products, not your body, so please consider that before you point the camera directly at the cavernous maw between your widely spread legs.

2. You're modelling the same string bikini you're selling? Anyone who even considers buying it will have to take into account that it's already been used as your own personal butthole floss.

3. Of all the parts of your body, those areas are the WORST to get wool-induced itchiness and rashes.

4. NINETY-FIVE DOLLARS??!!?!??!????? (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻)

Such confidence, such poise, such magnificent moobs.

The weather of course, being "Bodybuilding in Moscow".

You guys can do whatever you want down there as long as you keep girls like that below the Mason-Dixon.

I'm wishing they really were extinct now.

Probably should get out of the sun.

Sniff it while I check you out through my shutter shades.

You're not gonna get any customers like that.

Although now I'm really starting to wish that I had.

You can tell they're sisters, or at LEAST best friends with matching tastes, because of how well they go together.

Ok people, place your bets...is that a dude-like lady, or a lady-like dude?