beach

I'm trying to think of all the "CDs NUTZ" jokes from middle school... but I'd rather just stop looking at this picture.

Don't worry, in a few scant hours you'll be molting away like all the other pale kids.

It's RUINED you crazy kids and that little dog have spoiled EVERYTHING

Let's start a medieval-themed parade and head down to the BEACH! YYEEAAAHHH! It makes perfect sense!

It was only a matter of time. You can only bikini for so hard for so long before the fuzz comes by and ruins all of your fun.

On the bottom here we have your standard-issue "stocky guy," and up top we have "out of shape dad." I have a feeling you'll be pleased with this hybrid model of beach bod!

This can't be their natural habitat, however. I blame global warming for this kind of species migration. Or something. I'm not a zoo-lololgist.

I don't know what is more horrifying, the suit or the tan lines.

Woman, as if your neon eye-strangling spandex wasn't enough, you have to go ahead and make me uncomfortable with that watermelon on top of it.