the onion

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Maybe if You Combine the Two?

City - December 22 at 8:40pm Environmental Study Finds Air In Chicago Now 75% Bullets THEONION.COM Share The air in Chicago... The air they breathe... Is 75%. As in a majority... Bullets... As in firearms... Woah. December 22 at 8:47pm

RIP to the Fair People of Chicago

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Yep, Someone's Not Getting it Alright

the onion satire - 8294171648

It's Not Often That The Onion Gets Someone's Hopes Up This Much

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Here's Hoping This Fake Ad Campaign Never Comes to Light

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The Pants Struggle is Real

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Next She'll Be Looking Up the Melting Temperature of Steel...

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Nonsense Never Sounded Better

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You Were Too Young for This, Raisin

Image Michael Phelps olympics sports swimming the onion - 6506714112

Oh, the Humanity!

Text - 5 hours ago Huh??? Budget Woes Force Heaven To Reduce Eternal Life To 500 Billion Years www.theonion.com Share K WhAt Is this 4 hours ago I dont know, I thought it was interesting, lol read it,K about an hour ago - Edited

Heaven is for Real, and It's Full of Cheapskates

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The Extra Apostrophe is the Kicker

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Such a Brave Stance

super bowl the onion gullible trolled - 8038243072

The Lombardi Trophy of Broken Dreams

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Proof That The Onion Has Memory-Altering Properties

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The BeyHive Will Not be Pleased With This