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Make a list and never follow up on it. That's the way to procrastinate. Luckily you can just as easily procrastinate with a bunch of hilarious lists. Win-win.
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Employee gets laid off without notice, and when he says he already has a new job, he gets asked if he was going to give proper notice: ‘You just told me my role is done by Friday, and you're asking me about proper notice.’
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Employee stops overworking as it hasn't brought any raises, workload increases for everybody else, boss notices how much he was doing when he stopped: 'He admitted I was doing work that should have been divided between at least two roles.'
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Call center operator obliged to start 15 minutes before his shift to load the company's archaic software, told to work until 4:00 PM on the dot, he complies, ending a call right at the end of his shift: 'I am following expectations and written directions'
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Retail employer demands 24/7 GPS tracking on workers making $16/hour through a “workforce management” app on their personal phones, the employees refuse: ‘Why do they need my location at 11 PM, on weekends, or while I’m on vacation?’
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Delivery driver throws and kicks $30K worth of audio equipment on camera, the delivery company closed the complaint without responding, and only acted after a news station got involved
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