police

And also, none of these young ladies have have any history of misdemeanors, so you can stop asking them "Did you commit a parking violation? Because you have fine written all over you."

Probably because you're me! Now get outta here!

As an officer of the law, you're exempt from "elbow over the table" bro-code, namely because the first person who calls you out for it gets an open container violation and a night in the drunk tank. Yes, let the wookie--err I mean cop--win.

Let's put this in perspective: the legal limit for driving while intoxicated is a BAC of 0.08, meaning this guy had eight times the legal limit in his system. Furthermore, in Iowa state police academy curriculum, officers are taught that a person with a BAC of 0.40 are likely to be in a coma. This guy has 1.5 times the amount needed to kill a person, and he was still driving. Talk about holding your liquor!

Apparently, London police found a "hidey hole" full of individual baggies of pot. Of course they confiscated them, but they werekind enough to leave a note. 

Who knows if the dealer will #GetInTouch. We're guessing, probably not. 

It's probably not the best idea to prank cops, because they'll probably shoot you.

"Sir, stay calm! We have squad cars en route to Walmart to hook you up! Stay on the line!"