office swag

Can't let anyone see those balance reports...

Am I sure? How about you come a little closer so I can tell you...

Nothing wakes you up in the morning like a refreshing cup of...beer?

http://www.neatoshop.com/product/Dine-Ink-Pen-Utensil-Set

It's a desk that's attached to an elliptical machine. The machine is "designed to be pedaled at slower cadences that won't break one's concentration (or cause one to break a sweat." I don't know why anyone would need these, I just run in place while I'm seated at my desk. Burns more calories, and the impact of the foot hitting the floor builds more muscle.

Sure you lose volume to the octopus, but on the upside there'll be a freakin' octopus in your coffee.

Make sure your staff meetings are truly balls-to-the-wall with this conference room table/ping pong table hybrid. Subordinate wants a raise? If he can beat you at a little table tennis, it's his! It's $2,400.00, but I mean really... ping pong conference room table. Hello?

Making exercise and working a simultaneous effort.

For a fee, Chi Ha Paura will replace the boring ol' plastic "4" key on your keyboard (it's the one with the dollar sign, get it?) with a gold-plated silver key. It's pretty much the office equivalent of this:

All of my money: take it now, please.

The only way to get rid of it is with a headshot. Keep that in mind.