Random bit of dust in my eye....anyone else?
Valentines day
As if this could get any pettier, TMZ reports that all the Valentines "gifts" will be hand delivered. Kim K just won't let the people out there bring her down.
Via @casspa
It can't be easy to send an email. In between all the pressures of modern life, who has time to actually look at the picture you've attached and read the email that you just composed, especially when it's something important like Valentine's Day. That's rough.
We're not totally sure if this dude ever found out that this happened, but he accidentally sent a picture of some really inappropriate cookies to his office to encourage them to bring something for a Valentine's Day party. Ew, boy. That's embarrassing.I'm laughing too hard. Can't breathe.
— Cass Anderson (@casspa) February 14, 2017
Friend's office manager googled 'valentine's day cookies' and sent this email to his ENTIRE COMPANY. pic.twitter.com/4E6r0DA45R
How are you going to explain "You need to trim," "Your dick smells weird," and "Your mustache is stupid" to Fred from HR. Everyone knows that mustachioed moron has an overgrown pubic region and really smelly dick.
Wasn't yesterday just fanfuckintastic? A ton of lovedrunk, pie-eyed couples aspiring to realize their dreams of finally living out the rom-com movie they loved, and you loathed...madly running around for overpriced dinners, and budget-obliterating bottles of wine at tastefully overcrowded candlelit ristorantes (cause that's how you fancy spell restaurants, right) staffed by polished and meticulously groomed waiters that expect nothing less than the hefty kind of tip that'll send a man into a brothy sea of Top Ramen till next paycheck. Yeah, all rants aside. The 'holiday' is over, and these people brought their A game on Twitter when it came to expressing their 'Valentines Remorse' or lack thereof.
Time to up the game over there guys, because this 'heart-shaped' pizza only ended up looking like a dough-slinging chef missed his lunch break and had to take a bite out of something before popping the next batch of breadsticks in the oven.
The context of this situation only makes this FAIL more spectacular: sounds like the dude's girlfriend was trying to surprise him with a heart-shaped pizza at work, which is serious brownie points on steroids. Truly, a lady after my own heart. If only the Domino's pizza factory in question was up to the challenge. There's always next year.
Via WatchCut Video
Well well, this didn't fail to capture the endearing awkwardness of a couple of life's milestones. What better time to rehash on the cringe-inducing times of old than Valentine's Day or (Happy Alone Day)?
Well, that seals the deal: we're all getting lucky in one way or another tonight, am I right? The results themselves here are about on par with what you'd expect for the notorious, romantically-inclined, ever-commercialized holiday. People near and far definitely have the hard hearts on for the knee-buckling kind of orgasm that's artificially love-induced.
