religion

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Tumblr User Explains Their Annual "Moving of the Jesus"

It's a passive aggressive holiday ritual. Some families have elf on the shelf and others have "please take that horrible excuse for a Jesus away." For some more religious-themed tumblr shenanigans, here's a Tumblr thread on holy water loopholes and for more unique family dynamics here are people's weirdest family tics.

Funny tumblr thread on Jesus stick tradition | grumpsaesthetics every year around christmas and my grandma play this fun family game called “maybe want put jesus room instead, sweetie now s important note jesus referred our game is not actually real jesus christ, but instead wooden figure made 2011 has an uncanny resemblance lord and savior himself so happens is place jesus our living room, and my grandma smiles and asks if don't want decorate my room with him instead ask her return if she think
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Tumblr Thread Explains Holy Water Loopholes

Ever thought to dilute holy water? Well apparently you can. Some folks have a few jugs of pope-certified holy water just kinda hanging around in the back of their linen closet. For something lighter, here's a wholesome Tumblr story about summoning a demon while making a sandwich.

Funny tumblr thread on diluting holy water | meglyman Homeopathic holy kaijutegu 's not actually any amount holy water- according Church water has be more than half holy water by volume. So if take half gallon+ few drops holy water and half gallon secular water get one gallon holy water, plus few drops can then add gallon secular water and then have two gallons
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Everything about this is unforgettably uncomfortable. Those eyes are possessed, man. 

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Mom Thinks Sleep Paralysis is Literally Satan

For those not in the know, sleep paralysis is a pretty common phenomenon that's found all across the globe. You find yourself sort of in between being asleep and being awake, like you're conscious, but you can't move or speak. An episode of sleep paralysis can be accompanied by hallucinations that look like a face or figure, and that's commonly referred to as a demon or a visitor. It's pretty god damn scary. Anyway, this person told their mom and it backfired. People mess up, and sometimes that screw up is in their control. Here's a guy who thought a date was a job interview.

Mom thinks sleep paralysis demon is the devil | Posted by u/megs_wags 13 hours ago 2 TIFU by showing my mom drawing my sleep paralysis visitor get sleep paralysis have past few years off and on. Usually every couple months get sleep paralysis dream talked my parents about before fuck up is not they know fuck up is decided try drawing saw over my bed last night. And then sent picture my mom.
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Woman Gives Synopsis of Jesus Time Travel Assassination Movie

Apparently Assassin 33 AD just came out and it has a few people confused. Honestly, it's extremely hard to tell from the reviews and trailers if this is some low budget goofball satire, weird fundamentalist propaganda or an ill-fated sci-fi christian fever dream. Laura Robinson gives an interesting account on the film.

Woman's Twitter thread on real Time Travel Jesus Assassination movie | Laura Robinson @LauraRbnsn 14h There is deadly serious Christian action movie about Muslims who invent time travel so they can go back time and kill Jesus so he can't die our sins and course my husband bought because he's an actual monster. Q 87 2727 444 Laura Robinson @LauraRbnsn 14h My husband finds this hilarious have cringed myself back injury which will never recover. 04 109 Laura Robinson @LauraRbnsn 14h As an adult con
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Pastor Lies, Steals, Cheats On Wife With Multiple Women, Gets Found Out

Pastor Bob was out there selling the people on practicing certain parts of faith, while he was running around mistreating his wife in all kinds of ways. It sounds like he was even dipping into donation funds to finance his dates with various women, while he had a wife the whole time. Insane. Pastor Bob ultimately got what was coming his way. 

Pastor lies, steals, cheats on wife with multiple women, gets found out, and eventually fired | Pastor lies cheats and steals. He gets exactly he deserves. If want read on YouTube 's OK with can call kaldra or OP. as my user name is not easy. Sorry am on mobile. Also l'm sorry but need be very vague about where this happened
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Ways People Would Design "Mehven"

Someone on AskReddit asked for people to share the various ways they would design "Mehven" to ensure that it was tailored well for the people that just did an "alright" job throughout their lifetime. Not good, not bad, just meh. 

A collection of AskReddit replies to how people would handle designing "Mehven." A place meant for kind of good, but not great people | posted by Mecha_Genghis_Khan There's McDonalds but ice cream machine is still broken.
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Tumblr's Short Discussion on Diluting Holy Water

Hey man, you never know when a gallon of pope water could come in handy. So there's specific rules to how you can dilute holy water. The more you know. Tumblr has interesting discussions on religious history, like how angels could be viewed as absolutely terrifying.

Tumblr discussion on diluting holy water | Here's jug Pope water looks like. Mom measured fill line on them so never accidentally run out. shelf with cleaning supplies and a jug of water labeled with a marker. same jug on a chair.
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Conflicted over whether his singing or the well-timed railing kicks are the most amazing parts. This guy's a good person to keep around in your life. 

Via Shinigama
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Someone's clearly still mad about getting coal in his stocking for Christmas. What kind of guy goes around the mall yelling at kids that there's no Santa. Come on, man! 

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It kinda reminds us of English class when you would get to read as far into the lines as possible and just free-wheel a meaning for anything. We'd like to see what she thinks of redbull. Bull? Like a beast with horns? Red, like the color of Satan? It gives you wings? Like a fallen angel? Redbull is also the devil, y'all.

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Twitter Users Share The Rejected Commandments

Twitter users are breaking out the best and worst of their imagined "Rejected Commandments." These commandments didn't quite make the "formal cut" but that doesn't meant that our chaotic world wouldn't benefit just a little bit from people abiding by them. Especially that whole bit about people looking where they're going while driving. Sheesh. 

Twitter users share their most creative and ridiculous rejected commandments.
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Quora User Calls Out Religious Brainwashing Ritual

This Quora user decided to shed some light on what they view as a manipulative, brainwashing technique on the part of religious groups that advocate intense recruitment processes. Every Jehovah's Witness might stand to benefit from reading this. 

Quora user calls out religious recruitment process for being a brainwashing technique.
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