religion

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It kinda reminds us of English class when you would get to read as far into the lines as possible and just free-wheel a meaning for anything. We'd like to see what she thinks of redbull. Bull? Like a beast with horns? Red, like the color of Satan? It gives you wings? Like a fallen angel? Redbull is also the devil, y'all.

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Twitter Users Share The Rejected Commandments

Twitter users are breaking out the best and worst of their imagined "Rejected Commandments." These commandments didn't quite make the "formal cut" but that doesn't meant that our chaotic world wouldn't benefit just a little bit from people abiding by them. Especially that whole bit about people looking where they're going while driving. Sheesh. 

Twitter users share their most creative and ridiculous rejected commandments.
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Quora User Calls Out Religious Brainwashing Ritual

This Quora user decided to shed some light on what they view as a manipulative, brainwashing technique on the part of religious groups that advocate intense recruitment processes. Every Jehovah's Witness might stand to benefit from reading this. 

Quora user calls out religious recruitment process for being a brainwashing technique.
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Tumblr Thread Does The Math On Eating "A Whole Jesus"

Tumblr can get down into some wild rabbit holes, like what Disney does with its dirty pictures and what day Ice Cube's "Good Day" was. So here we have a simple question of how many wafers and wine you'd have to consume in order to, as a child says, "eat a whole Jesus." Gotta love an inquisitive mind.

Tumblr thread answers the question how many wafers and wine it would take to eat jesus' body weight.
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Satan Has A Twitter Account And His Social Media Game Is Strong

It shouldn't come as any surprise that Satan's Twitter game is devilishly clever. He's taken to Twitter more recently to spice up the mess with his own hot takes on the madness of existence, and how he feels about the land down under. 

twitter account of satan
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People are connecting with this ridiculous video of a preacher checking his phone, and proceeding to groan his ass off. Ever just have those days, where you pull up the phone and can't help but groan endlessly? 

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In 2009 John Piper was mistakenly switched with a comedian's intended time slot, and the audience assumed everything he was saying was deadpan humor. What a wonderful case of cringe. 

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Teacher Asks Students To Write Letter To God, It's A Beautiful Mess

This teacher decided to ask her students to write letters to God. The replies are nothing short of comedy gold. Whatever questions you might've had about God don't hold a candle to these kids and their curious letters. 

Teacher asks her students to write letters to God, and the resulting letters are a hilarious mess.
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Dad Drives Off Jehovah's Witnesses By Inviting Them In and Getting Hammered

Sometimes it's a Saturday and you just want to relax without anyone evangelizing to you. Things started off polite, but after having his door knocked on a third time, this guy thought that he should be more bold and really weird them out. And it worked. When dads aren't making dad jokes they're getting epic dad revenge.

Dad gets annoyed by jehova's witnesses, so he invites them in, gets drunk and starts showing them his guns before they run away.
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Landlord Uses Bible To Justify Raising The Rent, Tenant Misses The Joke

In all fairness, if you found yourself caught up in a scenario where your landlord was potentially trying to raise the rent with the bible as justification...you'd be a little peeved too. Fortunately, the landlord was in fact agnostic, and just messing around with a friend who was "way too easy to rile up." He got her good. 

Landlord "uses the Bible" to justify a rent hike, and the tenant totally misses the joke.
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If Bible Figures Had Tinder Bios (18 Images)

The verdict's yet to be determined on whether or not these silly and hilarious Tinder bios properly capture various bible figures for all their quirks. Either way, even if you only know a few of these they're definitely entertaining. 

tinder profiles of biblical figures such as king David and Delilah
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Religious Missionary Called Out For Being Part Of The Church's Pain Reward Cycle Ritual

When this religious missionary asked a question on Quora about why people got so angry when they tried to spread the word of God with them, they got called out with an analysis on how the church can end up fueling something of a "pain reward cycle" ritual amongst its religious missionaries. They end their educational rant with a nice, "sorry I have absolutely no desire to participate in someone' brainwashing ritual." 

Quora post about the pain reward cycle of the church
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Triggered Christians Petition Netflix To Cancel Amazon Prime's "Good Omens"

Over 20,000 people have petitioned Netflix to cancel "Good Omens." The big and beautiful fail here though is that "Good Omens" is actually an Amazon Prime show. Ha! The Christian campaign called "Return to Order" is seemingly destined for nothing but one big whopping failure. 

The petition has issues with the relationship between the show's angel and demon, as well as the God character being voiced by a woman. It references the show as being another step towards making Satanism "normal, light, and acceptable." 

Neil Gaiman who began creating the series following the request of Terry Pratchett, has trolled the campaign to sweet perfection on Twitter. 

twitter religion FAIL triggered social media ridiculous christians - 8647173
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