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Make a list and never follow up on it. That's the way to procrastinate. Luckily you can just as easily procrastinate with a bunch of hilarious lists. Win-win.
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Job candidate logs onto Zoom interview early and overhears that an offer has already been made, proceeds to call them out: 'Hey guys, just so you know, I can hear you!'
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Employee demands to be fired after company shifts from fully remote work to 3 days from the new office, boss agrees: 'I will not work a single day from this box'
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Resident grows tired of "friendly" neighbor coming onto their property to do yard work at 6:00 am, they demand he stop, waking up the neighborhood as a result: 'Apparently he has nothing better to do'
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Entitled friend uses roommate's car after her own car breaks down, roommate demands she stop when she takes it on leisure drives without asking: 'Fix your own car'
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Team working 50 hours per week all quit at the same time: 'If there's anything we can do to keep you, let me know'
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