tinder

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Kayla Hutch is not having your bullsh*t dude. This is just ridiculous. What was the guy thinking? In what universe would this play out where he didn't end up looking like a shameless toolbag with the moral compass of a sex-crazed, idiotic degenerate? You could say his operation was doomed from the start.



Yes, Kayla Hutch showed up for this date under the assumption she was headed out for a romantic evening on Lake Michigan. In her live-stream Kayla says:

“Six months ago I went on Tinder and matched with Adam,” Kayla explains in her Facebook live stream, “He’s been messaging me and texting me for six months and I haven’t been responding until he said there was a boat. The first girl I met, said: ‘How do you know Adam?’ She said, ‘We met on Tinder.’ Now I’m stuck here for five hours.”

Fortunately Kayla managed to make it back to shore, even with the whole 'not being able to swim' thing going on. All in all, a massive heaping of FAIL.

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Guy's Psycho Tinder Match Makes Crazy Look Sane

"No worries, I'm not crazy like your ex." Run, run for the hills! This guy dodged a big bullet with this Tinder match. Brace yourself for unhealthy levels of tireless pushiness, cringe, and anger. Like, she seems mad at something more than half the time. Yikes. 

Girl on Tinder goes psycho on a guy
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woman describes tinder date with pharma bro martin shkreli
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If there was ever a time to point to something and say "see, girls really do like jerks!" this would be it.

Late last year, a woman named Jacklyn Collier went on a date with pharma bro Martin Shkreli some time after his AIDs drug price hike occurred. And then she wrote about it for The Washington Post.

They 'met' on Tinder, where he wooed her with lines like "I’m that guy who has been in the news lately," and sent her photos of his license and credit card as proof of identity. Who could resist a date with that guy? To be fair, Collier describes her motivations for the date as a little less than perfectly honest:

I also had a fantasy of being the manic pixie dream girl who helped him turn his life around. I pictured us opening an HIV/AIDS clinic together and wandering the streets of New York, handing out wads of cash to homeless people and other strangers.


On their date, Shkreli was apparently very awkward and polite. Collier is a vegetarian, so Shkreli (via his assistant) made sure the restaurant could accomodate her diet:

Martin asked, “Is there a vegetarian menu? My assistant said there was a vegetarian menu. There’s a vegetarian menu, right?” He wasn’t being a jerk; it was more of an “I’m stressed because my date doesn’t put raw fish in her mouth” kind of comment.


Aw, he was stressed! He also apparently admitted that just one drink was enough for him: "Martin told me that he was a lightweight, something I’d never heard a man admit on a date (or ever)." Collier seems kind of impressed by this.



As the date went on, Collier and Shkreli discussed their days and Shkreli layed on some thick philanthropy talk, but overall seemed like an okay dude:

Throughout our date, I saw occasional glimpses of the cocky Martin I had expected, but those were the moments that seemed the most false to me, as if putting on a confident-dude front. He seemed the most genuine when he was acting like the guys I hung out with in high school (I dated the president of the chess club); that’s probably why I felt so comfortable on our date.


At the end of the date, Shkreli pulled a real power move that Collier totally didn't see coming: he ordered a $120 cup of tea they had joked about being ridiculous earlier, then proceeded to tell Collier he wasn't much of a tea drinker. Collier describes her reaction to the moment: 

I thought of all the good I could do with that money — donating it to charity, buying a new winter coat, buying myself 20 Venti iced soy vanilla chai lattes. He might as well have eaten a $100 bill in front of me.


Afterwards, Shkreli's driver took Collier home. She was left not interested in dating him, but without the sour taste one would expect from spending an evening with 2015's most hated dude:

I am not trying to excuse his professional behavior or say he’s a good person. (I can’t really tell from one date and occasional text communication.) But he’s a lot more interesting and complex than I would have imagined.

My only regret is not guzzling a cup of that $120 tea. As far as Tinder dates go, I’d call that a win.

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Guy Matches With Hot, Sex-Crazed Tinder Chick Who Makes Most Ridiculous Fetish Requests We've Seen Since the App Was Created

What fresh hell is this? Sure, if that's actually her (and this isn't some perverse, bottom-feeding catfish at work) she clearly takes care of herself. And yeah, there's something to be said of the sexually fierce, if not experimental personalities when it comes to bedroom discourse; but bro, this is seven kinds of crazy, and outright ridiculous. The only reasonable course of action for our Tinder dude victim of the hour is to take his phone, toss it in the microwave, set to five minutes, and let it rip into a weird, fresh-fried memory of the past. 



crazy Fetish tinder sexy times dating - 1613573
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Sizzl tinder ios oscar mayer dating App iphone - 8565834240
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Oscar Mayer just released a dating app, that looks very similar to Tinder, for people who are really fond of bacon

So it's basically just Tinder.

Insisting that it's a very real dating app, the cold cuts and meat production company has launched a website and rolled out the swiping app.

It's location based, so you'll have to tell that meat factory where you are at all times. But it comes with something called a 'Sizzl-meter'. Here's what they say about it on their FAQ

Q: How does the "Sizzl-meter" work?

A: Good question. Holding down the Sizzl-meter on a user's profile indicates your level of interest. The longer you hold, the more Sizzl you feel for them.

So romantic.

There's even a way to report people who don't love bacon!



Unfortunately, only iPhone users can currently find their true bacon lovers.

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30 Tinder Profiles That Did Away With Small Talk, And Were Shamelessly Slutty

These fine and mighty and depraved Tinderellas all but stepped on 'dating app' ceremony, and instead opted for shameless, sexualized-displays of self-promotion. Are some of these borderline insane, and giving off the distinct whiff of potential sex addiction? Suure. Are they also dually awesomely transparent? Absolutely, and there's no doubt they're the kind of profiles that didn't rake in a truckload of right swipes... Tinder really is full of surprises. You never know what you'll find. 

slutty tinder profiles | Brassiere - Sarah, 29 42 miles away Active 2 hours ago 34J. Yes, they're rea | Woman - Valentina, 18 Aupair 13 miles away grown but not grown, grown. Which means know ride dick but still not sure taxes work. | Woman - Alicia, 18 Idon't want brag, but don't need chew eating banana.
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Guy Eats a Boatload of Adderall and Then Goes on Tinder Rampage with DMing All of His Matches

The dude clearly needs to tone it down a notch, and was clearly just a tad bit overstimulated to come across as clear and comprehensive (and sane) with his matches.

Adderall Tinder Rampage
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16 Ridiculous Tinder Pickup Lines That Expose Craziness Of Dating Apps

Just when we were convinced that the fine denizens of Tinder couldn't get any more ridiculous and genuinely outlandish on an app that seemingly thrives on being predictably absurd, we get yet more conversational gems. It's like half these sorry souls weren't even exerting 5% effort. 

Funny and ridiculous pickup lines that expose the craziness of dating apps in the modern world.
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This Is What Happens When A Dungeon Master Slides Into Your Tinder DMS

Dungeons and Dragons may not seem like the sexiest game in the world, but this Tinder user has shown us that being a Dungeon Master really allows one to keep the conversation going. 

Funny tinder messages between a dungeons and dragons dungeon master and a girl on tinder, online dating.
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