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Guy Delivers Dark Poetic Justice to a Spambot Desperately Trying to Strip

He recognized the spambot almost immediately, but didn't stop there. What follows next is some of the most emo poetry you will ever read. It's a shame the spambot only cares about getting naked because this dude would have totally become a tree for his new friend.

"We will grow a forest from our new bodies." "Help me rot into the earth."

sex list spambot troll funny dating poetry - 808965
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49 People Share Their Craziest and Proudest NSFW Achievements

Keep these crazy fiends off the streets! There would seem to be a recurrent, sexualized theme running rampant across these various achievements as well. 

List of peoples' craziest inappropriate achievements.
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Sexual consent is something that you should always get from your partner before you bang. But is an app really the best way to go about getting it?

For starters, talk about a moodkiller. "Here, before we go any further, let me have you complete this form on my phone. So hawt."

Second, if someone is "pretty wasted," as one of the app's sobriety options reads, are they going to truthfully report said sobriety while they're drunk, knowing full well that marking "pretty wasted" kills the consent process? If you're drunk and ready, you're drunk and ready, and your phone yapping at you saying that you don't give consent is only liable to piss you off, not stop what you're about to do.

Third, if one party does in fact revoke consent mid-sex, what are you doing to do? Pull out your phone again and change your answer from "I'm Good2Go" to "No, Thanks?"

Fourth, tying into the last point, what is the app actually meant to accomplish from a legal perspective? How is someone going to prove that they revoked consent when they originally put "I'm Good2Go" at the start of the encounter?

"You see, Your Honor, I know I said that I was Good2Go, but then I changed my mind and was Bad2Go like five minutes in!" "Too bad! The app says you were Good2Go and that's it! Case closed!"

Last, but perhaps not least, I can barely type my lock screen password in while I'm drunk. Am I really going to be able choose consent, choose my (truthful) sobriety level, put in my phone number and create a password all as quickly as they claim you can? Unlikely.

All in all, sexual consent isn't just a good idea: it's mandatory. End of story. But bringing in a confusing app complete with phone numbers, passwords, and dubious legal authority might not be the best way to get it.

Plus it just ends up reminding me of this:

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If you're reading this and you happen to hail from Alaska, then you've my sincerest condolences; cause bruh, you apparently live in an STD-ridden state populated by sexually active folk with a staggeringly underdeveloped ability to use protection. 

By Unknown
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As if Rick Santorum's political aspirations didn't have enough problems, one of his supporters said on live television that everyone's making too big a fuss about silly things like sexual rights and just shove some aspirin up there, like they did in "his day."

Courtesy of Pundit Kitchen, your one-stop shop for political LOLs (because there's so very, very much to LOL at).

Rio Olympics Sexy Tinder Users
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RAWR, those Olympic bodies!



Rio athletes have been allocated 450,000 condoms, and it seems they intend to use them all.



Tinder use has been up, with an increase in matches of 129% in the Olympic Village over the weekend.



But with bodies like these...









...all we can be is jealous.

Read the full AP article here.

graph loud noise overheard sex share house We Are Dating - 5161752832
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That moment when you're not sure if your housemates heard you having sex or not: you don't know whether they're acting awkward or not, and you're not sure whether you should act awkward or not.

People who aren't awkward don't have this problem, but I don't know anyone like this.