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Make a list and never follow up on it. That's the way to procrastinate. Luckily you can just as easily procrastinate with a bunch of hilarious lists. Win-win.
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Employee gets punished for being great at his job, so he decides to stop trying at all: 'Even though I performed my duties better than the others in my department, I was effectively punished for being so good.'
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Man leaves brother's landscaping company after years of being underpaid, later warns prospective business partner about secret plan to absorb his clients and equipment: 'Family members think i betrayed my brother'
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Girlfriend making $15/hour secretly buys an $800/month truck with her dad, texts her boyfriend after signing, destroying their apartment plans in one morning
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Roommate leaves for summer internship, subleases room for $1,650 without consulting housemates, leaves 2-week gap at end of contract and expects them to cover the rent: 'I'm subsidizing your rent'
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A hardworking man refuses to let his brother live rent-free in his second flat after years of saving to buy it: ‘I can't set myself on fire to keep him warm’
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