drinking

Siri is like that loud sweaty guy who's in or comes from a frat, who says "Dude! Stand up and take another shot bro! Come on, you can do this!" to the guy who can't figure out where the floor is.

Bro: It's now a verb.

And usually i catch myself before I text something lame. Less so with speaking, which is why I somehow found myself blurting "The Puppy Bowl will be a total cat-tastrophe!" the other day. Dumb. Dogs aren't even cats.